I Am A Real Person... Who Happens To Code At Superhuman Speed

Scientists: "We've created an AI that's consistently wrong." Tech CEOs: "Ship it." And that's how we ended up with chatbots that confidently explain why you should add milk before cereal, virtual assistants that send your grocery list to your ex, and AI that swears your code will work perfectly despite 47 syntax errors. The modern tech industry in a nutshell: if it's broken but profitable, it's a feature not a bug.

Nothing says "modern developer" quite like pasting ChatGPT responses into production and calling yourself "full-stack." The sad Pepe frog knows the truth – your stack is just HTML you barely understand, vibes you're desperately faking, and bugs you can't fix without asking AI for help again. The tears aren't from debugging; they're from the realization that your entire career is held together by prompts and prayers.

Turns out we've been doing rubber duck debugging with ChatGPT all along. The sheer act of articulating your problem clearly enough for an AI to understand it forces your brain to actually think through the logic—and boom, solution appears before you even hit send. It's the digital equivalent of walking to your coworker's desk with a question, then figuring it out halfway through explaining it. The irony is chef's kiss: we built advanced AI only to rediscover the power of just thinking out loud.

The circle of startup AI innovation: Manager asks impossible question → Developer frantically asks ChatGPT → Developer presents ChatGPT's answer as their own work → Manager impressed → Company secures another round of funding. Let's be honest, half the "AI strategy" presentations in boardrooms right now are just regurgitated LLM outputs with fancy transitions. The real innovation is how quickly we've normalized outsourcing our thinking to robots while maintaining our poker faces.

GASP! The AUDACITY of developers thinking they can hide behind AI! 💅 When you run git blame to find out which MONSTER broke the code, it reveals the actual HUMAN criminal - not GitHub Copilot! Your AI assistant isn't taking the fall for your disaster of a commit, sweetie! That's right, your name is PERMANENTLY etched in the git history hall of shame! There's no escaping accountability in this dystopian developer hellscape!

Look at this good boy pretending to be a "programmer" by wearing glasses and sitting in front of chemistry equipment. The modern equivalent of putting on a stethoscope and claiming you're a doctor. Prompt engineering isn't programming, Karen. Asking ChatGPT to build you a website is like asking a golden retriever to perform surgery—sure, they're enthusiastic about helping, but someone else is definitely cleaning up that mess later. The real irony? The dog probably has a better chance of writing functional code than someone whose entire tech stack is "Hey ChatGPT, fix this thing I broke."