I Hate Microsoft

Nothing says "I'm a laptop user" quite like having a literal inferno between your legs and pretending everything's normal. PC gamers panic when their GPU hits 80°C, but laptop warriors casually type through third-degree burns as their machine transforms into a portable crematorium. The best part? The warranty specifically excludes "damage caused by using laptop on actual lap" - which is literally in the name of the device. Pure marketing genius!

Content how to fake being a programmer 'haha windows is bad' 'php more like phpepsi' 'when you were 12 i was coding in basic' 'im not like other programmers' 'stack overflow comes to me for help' 'i dont use an ide because word 2007 has all the functionality i need'

The oldest trick in the book still claims victims in 2070! For the uninitiated, Alt+F4 is the universal Windows shortcut to immediately close your current application - no questions asked, no saves prompted. It's the digital equivalent of pulling the power cord. What makes this golden is the generational warfare. Some kid thinks they're clever trolling grandpa with the oldest prank in computing, not realizing this veteran was executing keyboard combos when the kid's parents were still figuring out how to use a sippy cup. The future may have neural interfaces and quantum computing, but the classics never die - just like the game you were playing when you hit Alt+F4.

That awkward moment when a user proudly announces they've rebooted twice, while your system monitor shows their uptime is 365 days, 12 hours, 38 minutes, and 59 seconds . The face says it all—the silent judgment of an IT professional who knows you're either lying or don't understand what "reboot" means. The computer hasn't been turned off since Biden was still forming complete sentences. At this point, that machine deserves a retirement party more than a reboot.

The pun game is strong with this one! What you're looking at is the evolution of scrollbars from 1988 to 2012. The title "The Elder Scrolls" brilliantly plays on the popular video game series while showcasing these ancient UI artifacts that younger devs might not even recognize. Notice how scrollbars went from chunky, obvious controls to increasingly minimalist designs until they practically disappeared? That's modern UI for you—hiding functionality until users need a treasure map and three divination spells to figure out how to scroll down a page. Remember when you could actually grab a scrollbar without pixel-perfect precision? Those were the days. Now we're all expected to have the fine motor control of a neurosurgeon just to navigate a webpage. Progress!

The eternal longing of Linux developers... dreaming of a fully-functional Visual Studio experience while Microsoft continues to ghost their relationship status. Sure, VS Code exists, but it's like getting a text that says "u up?" at 2am instead of a proper commitment. That purple Visual Studio icon next to the Linux penguin represents the forbidden love that Microsoft keeps teasing but never fully delivers on. The cloud shows what we truly desire in our hearts - a world where we don't have to dual-boot Windows just to use the good IDE.