Reject Modernity, Embrace Tradition

The classic management time warp. Six months ago: "Epic UI design guys, love it!" Two days before deadline: "Wtf is this garbage UI?" Same design. Same manager. Different proximity to deadline. You could build the Sistine Chapel of interfaces and it'll still be "garbage" when the sprint's ending. Ten years in the industry and I've yet to see a manager who remembers approving anything.

The evolution of "idea people" is too real! Back in the day, non-technical folks with "million dollar ideas" would beg programmers to build their app for free or equity. Now these same people skip straight to AI tools like Figma and no-code platforms, thinking they're self-sufficient until they hit that inevitable technical landmine. Meanwhile, the programmer continues peacefully napping, completely unbothered by the explosion. The sweet karma of technical debt will always find you!

The eternal JavaScript type coercion strikes again! In the first panel, someone proudly declares JavaScript as their favorite language. But the punchline reveals why developers have a love-hate relationship with it—when you add 1 to the string "11", JavaScript helpfully concatenates them into "111" instead of doing math. Yet when you subtract 1 from "11", it suddenly decides to convert the string to a number and returns 10. This inconsistent type handling is why senior devs develop eye twitches whenever someone mentions JavaScript. It's like having a calculator that sometimes decides to spell out numbers in interpretive dance.

Oh boy, someone gave the sales guy access to ChatGPT and he immediately built a "caffeine intake calculator for the world to see" running on localhost:8000. Because nothing says "global deployment" like a development server that only works on your own machine. The best part? He's proudly announcing it on LinkedIn like he just launched the next unicorn startup. Meanwhile, every developer in the comments is screaming internally because localhost literally means "only accessible on YOUR computer, buddy." It's like building a restaurant in your basement and wondering why customers aren't showing up. Pro tip for our entrepreneurial friend: before you revolutionize the world with your AI-generated app, maybe learn the difference between localhost and an actual deployed URL. But hey, at least we know he's consuming 495mg of caffeine per day—he's gonna need it when the devs explain networking basics to him.

The classic "let me know if you need anything else" client interaction has reached its final form. Some non-technical person casually asking you to "write my entire app" while they nap is the modern equivalent of "can you fix my printer while you're here?" Except now they want you to build the next Facebook during their power nap. The sinister wojak response is every developer's inner monologue when clients have absolutely no concept of time, effort, or reality. We smile politely while internally plotting to make their app harvest data and addict users... because that's totally how programming works, right?

The elegant waitstaff vs. the ragtag pirates perfectly captures the data access divide. APIs are like fancy servers bringing you data on a silver platter with proper documentation and rate limits. Meanwhile, web scrapers are the digital pirates who'll rip the data straight from the HTML's cold, dead hands when no API exists. After 15 years in the trenches, I've written both. The API is what you show the client. The scraper is what you build at 2 AM when the client's competitor suddenly becomes "very interesting" to them.