Having A Website (Or Having Your Credentials Stolen)

Windows: "No security updates! You're vulnerable!" *checks system* Also Windows: "Hey, we've got a security update from... *checks notes*... 2025!?" Nothing says "trust our security warnings" like scheduling patches from the future. Microsoft's time machine development must be going well—shame they can't use it to make Windows actually stable. At least the cat's expression perfectly captures that moment when you realize your OS is either lying or has achieved time travel.

THE ABSOLUTE AUDACITY of these verification forms showing you the code right above the input boxes! Like, honey, if I can SEE the code, why in the name of all that is holy do I need to TYPE IT?! 🤦‍♀️ It's the digital equivalent of someone handing you a note that says "Please write down what this note says" while you're still holding the original note! Security theater at its most ridiculous! What's next? Asking me to screenshot the password and email it back for "extra verification"?!

The ultimate programming double entendre! A building with a "STOP RUST" sign that was clearly meant for metal corrosion, but has become an unintentional declaration of war against the Rust programming language. Somewhere a C++ developer is nodding vigorously while hanging this poster in their cubicle. Meanwhile, Rust developers are organizing a protest outside this building with signs that read "MEMORY LEAKS KILL" and "SEGMENTATION FAULT: CORE DUMPED." The programming language holy wars have officially spilled into real estate.

The ultimate security theater—an Epson projector with a "PASSWORD PROTECTED" sticker slapped on it. Because nothing says "Fort Knox" like a device whose default password is probably "admin" or "0000". The IT department's noble attempt at security that'll stop absolutely no one except the presenter who actually needs to use it five minutes before the demo. Meanwhile, the hacker in the audience is thinking, "Ah yes, this sophisticated 4-digit barrier is truly impenetrable."

Evil genius level: 100. Naming your cat with regex and special characters is basically the digital equivalent of setting a trap for unsuspecting Linux users. Type that in your terminal and congratulations—you've just executed a shell command that probably destroyed something important! The cat's expression says it all: "Yes human, please do exactly as instructed. I've been planning world domination since you thought it was cute to name me after syntax that breaks your computer."

The first part of this authentication function is actually doing its job—checking if the password matches. But then comes the security masterpiece: if (true == true) . Congratulations, you've created the digital equivalent of a bouncer who checks your ID and then lets you in anyway because "yep, gravity still works!" This function will authenticate literally anyone who gets past the first check... or fails it and just keeps trying. Security experts hate this one weird trick!