AI Can Almost Do A "FIXME"... We're Cooked

Nobody wants to touch those crusty desktop frameworks from the 90s anymore. Qt and WinForms? Hard pass. But wrap a glorified browser in a desktop shell and call it "cross-platform" and suddenly everyone's throwing confetti. "Look mom, I made a desktop app with 500MB of node_modules and it only takes 8 seconds to launch a hello world!" The absolute state of desktop development in 2023 - where your app is basically a website that somehow uses more RAM than Photoshop.

The GUI framework you're using is clearly CSS - the framework where your curly braces slide down the page like they're trying to escape your code. Nothing says "modern interface design" quite like spending 6 hours debugging why your parentheses decided to form a diagonal conga line instead of actually rendering a button. And they say frontend is easier than algorithms!

When you're so good at stopping DDoS attacks that you accidentally DDoS yourself. Cloudflare, the company that shields websites from attacks, managed to take down their own API with a simple React useEffect hook mistake. It's like a firefighter setting their own station on fire while demonstrating how not to start fires. The irony is just *chef's kiss* - a dashboard loop causing an API outage. Somewhere, a junior dev is updating their resume while a senior dev is explaining to management that "it worked on my machine."

Free software advocate Richard Stallman having an existential crisis after learning Windows 11's Start menu is a React Native app that devours CPU cycles. Microsoft really said "let's make clicking a button as resource-intensive as possible" and shipped it anyway. The irony of using a JavaScript framework for a core OS function is just *chef's kiss* perfect. Your 32GB RAM gaming rig struggling to open a menu that MS-DOS could handle with 640K. Progress!

Just spent six months becoming a React guru, and now everyone's talking about some framework with a fruit name that's "10x faster" and "the future of web development." The frontend ecosystem is basically a treadmill designed by sadists. You're never done learning—you're just temporarily less obsolete than yesterday. The worst part? You'll still rewrite everything in vanilla JS five years from now when the cycle repeats itself.

The cosmic horror of discovering that the language you've been trying to escape has consumed the entire programming universe. JavaScript started as that quirky little browser language, then quietly infiltrated servers with Node.js, slithered into mobile apps with React Native, and now apparently runs the simulation we call reality. Future archaeologists will dig through the ruins of our civilization and find nothing but npm dependency trees going all the way down. The astronaut with the gun is just acknowledging what senior developers have known all along—resistance is futile, and we're all just writing JavaScript with extra steps.