The Python Developer's Duality

Content PlatinumGamer55 11 Going from python to java is like going from nursery school to Vietnam SpEZiL 1 7 nah So what's going from Python to C? Not-Post-Malone 12 Nursery school to Vietnam with pointers 4h 4h 00 2h

Content rPython Join PYTHON ISN'T REAL - IT'S GLUE Meta This language is built upon decades of lies. PYTHON IS A TABULATED GLUE, TO GLUE TOGETHER CC (ACTUAL) CODE! It's all just plain text with no actual code behind it. Have you ever seen Python binaries? No? Because they don't exist! Python is slow because an adhesive can not be fast. Like if you replace thermal past in computer for glue, it will not transfer heat fast. Just like if you replace compiled language with Python, bits and bytes cannot flow effectively. You are writing gigabytes of wastefull TABULATED text files and call them py to then offload ACTUAL work to underlying CC. It's pathetic, that a plain text is being called "language" when a computer CAN'T SPEAK IT If this gets deleted, this is truth! Move to Rust! PYTHONERS, WAKE UP FROM THIS DELUSIONAL BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE! ProarammerHumor.io

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Sorting imports by character length instead of alphabetically or by module type? That's like organizing your sock drawer by how much each sock weighs. Sure, it looks oddly satisfying with that gradient effect, but your code reviewer is probably drafting your performance review right now. The real horror isn't the sorting method – it's that you're importing both matplotlib AND sklearn in the same file. That poor memory usage never stood a chance.

The cultural shock when a Python programmer encounters MATLAB's 1-based indexing is like discovering your favorite coffee shop now exclusively serves decaf. In Python, arrays start at index 0 like any civilized programming language. Then MATLAB comes along with its "indexes start at 1" heresy, triggering an existential crisis in developers who've built their entire identity around zero-based indexing. The transition is basically the five stages of grief, except you get stuck in the anger phase indefinitely. And that little MATLAB mascot's smug face isn't helping matters.

Content STOP DOING COMPUTER SCIENCE Computers were supposed to solve math, NOT to be programmed C is a LETTER, not a language Wanna print() something? Write it in a PAPER with a PEN "I'm writing a recursive method with threads to optimize the CPU usage in a 0.02" THIS IS A NONSENSICAL STATEMENT MADE BY DERANGED PEOPLE Look at what PROGRAMMERS have been demanding your respect for, after all the led lights we put in their computers: (This is real COMPUTER SCIENCE, done by real COMPUTER SCIENTISTS): os.syal FUNNY GOLORED LETTERS 178 COMPILATION ERRORS????? A FAKE TEAPOT YOU CAN'T USE IF PROGRAMMING WAS REAL HOW COME NOBODY THOUGHT IN DOING while(true) print(money); THEY PLAYED US FOR ABSOLUTE FOOLS