When Devs Moonlight At McDonald's

The eternal gap between theoretical architecture and actual production traffic! 😂 When someone asks if your system can handle a million concurrent users, but your current load is just TEN people, what do you do? Tell the truth and look incompetent or confidently lie and pray you'll never have to prove it? This is basically every startup pitch deck vs. actual server metrics. "Oh yeah, our architecture is totally cloud-native, horizontally scalable to infinity!" Meanwhile, the poor Node.js server is running on a t2.micro instance that crashes when three people use the search function simultaneously. The best part? When the miracle happens and you actually get that traffic spike, you'll be frantically Googling "how to optimize database queries at 3am" while telling management "it's just a minor scaling issue!"

Content Doctors: Googling stuff online does not make you a doctor. Sevas Programmers:

Content LET'S START ANDROID STUDIO DONE

The irony of TypeScript in its purest form! Someone's proudly declaring "TypeScript is good because it's a typed language!!" but then immediately betrays that principle by using any type - the escape hatch that basically turns TypeScript back into JavaScript. It's like buying a security system for your house and then leaving the key under the doormat. The shocked cat face perfectly captures how the TypeScript compiler must feel watching developers circumvent its entire purpose with a single keyword.

Content Joma jomaoppa I saw a software engineer today No company swag hoodie. No stickers on their laptop. No mechanical keyboard. He just sat there. Typing away on our default IDE. Like a psychopath.

Content Ben Halpern bendhalpern Sometimes when I'm writing Javascript I want to throw up my hands and say "this is bullshit!" but I can never remember what "this" refers to