The Impostor Syndrome

Content Me trying to understand Modulo when i started programming: V A 772 21 sin cOs 309 459 60 NS NI- 7 1 2 tan 2x 30 60 made with mematic Jsin xdx - cos. C de cos? jigxdx -In cosx Intg C sinx 2 de -arcig? (24x dx In tan (6) 10 Bred

Ah yes, the sacred first step to coding divinity - buying the Gang of Four book! Nothing says "I'm about to become a programming deity" like ordering the Design Patterns bible and having it arrive in a beat-up Amazon package. The journey of a thousand abstractions begins with a single Factory Pattern! Bonus points if you display it prominently on your desk for six months without actually reading past chapter 3. We've all been there... ascension to godhood pending...

Content LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IT IS WITH GREAT PLEASURE I INFORM YOU THAT THE FESTIVE CHANGE FREEZE PERIOD HAS COMMENCED

Ah, the classic escalation protocol when your rubber duck has failed you. That smug smile says it all - "I've upgraded to a real duck now, checkmate universe." For those complex bugs where explaining your code to a yellow plastic bath toy just isn't cutting it anymore. Sure, the duck won't actually respond with solutions, but at least this one can judge your terrible code with authentic avian disappointment. Next step: hiring an actual programmer to sit silently while you explain your spaghetti code. Though fair warning - unlike the duck, they might actually laugh at your variable naming conventions.

Content What's the worst code you've seen a paid programmer X write? Danny Kodicek, Educational Software Developer and Teacher Answered Jun 24 Without a doubt, my own. The worst piece of programming I ever did, which shames me to this day, was when a friend asked me to put together a countdown clock for the London 2012 Olympic committee. The announcement was due to be made whether London had won the bid, they were having a party, and they wanted a countdown on the wall. It wasn't exactly a difficult job, but I put some work in to make it look nice. But I forgot one rather crucial detail. And so the next day I discovered people had watched the clock and chanted along as it counted down... 00:05 00:04 00:03 00:02 00:01 00:00 00:-01 00:-02 My cheeks burn every time I think of it.

The fastest way to burn through $100M? Just whisper "AWS" and watch your bank account evaporate. That SRE knew exactly what they were doing - nothing drains a budget faster than spinning up a few "right-sized" EC2 instances and forgetting about them for a weekend. The genie immediately adding a fourth rule is basically Amazon's business model in a nutshell. Honestly, at least gambling gives you a chance of winning something back.