The Full Stack Medical Miracle Worker

When your startup investor says "just code it" and suddenly you're expected to violate the laws of physics, medicine, and ethics simultaneously. The bearded programmer's thousand-yard stare says it all – somewhere between "I need stronger coffee" and "I should've become a farmer." This is basically the Theranos business model repackaged as a casual Slack request. Sure thing, boss! Let me just invent impossible medical technology between standup meetings while maintaining perfect code and definitely not committing securities fraud. No biggie!