SWE Pro Career Move

Content HR: WHY SHOULD WE HIRE YOU? ME: NAH YOU TELL ME WHY THIS POSITION IS VACANT? WHY PEOPLE ARE LEAVING YOUR COMPANY? le HR

Content Professor: Make a program to display tomorrow's time. Me: 2 3 4 5 1 void gettomorrowdate ( struct timeval date ) sleep ( 86400 ); 60 60 24 gettimeofday ( date, 0 ); Me: Let's wait for a while, it is compiling Professor: 1010, now fuck off and please never come back to this class

Content 2023! Happy 1672614000 seconds since 111970!

The eternal cycle of software development delusion. You start with grandiose architecture plans worthy of a Nobel Prize, convince yourself you're writing something halfway decent, then ship what's essentially the Chrome dinosaur game with fewer features. Ten years in the industry and I still do this every Monday morning. The gap between ambition and reality is where developer tears are born.

Well, that explains why my doctor keeps asking if I've been "exposed to HTML" during checkups. And here I thought my code was just dirty because of poor indentation. The real kicker? These are the same people who'll confidently tell you they "know computers" before asking you to fix their printer. This is why we can't have nice things in tech - 10% of the population thinks we're spreading disease by writing <div> tags. Next time someone asks what I do for a living, I'm just going to say "I work at McDonald's." Safer that way.

Content What people think I do What my parents think I do What I think I do MA TALE What I really do Google How to use dates in Javascript