First You Touch Then You Cat

Content ONLY THE CODE ONLY THE CODE WAS CHANGED WAS CHANGED SO THE CODE IS THE ISSUE SO THE CODE IS THE ISSUE ONLY THE CODE WAS CHANGER SO THE CODE IS THE ISSUE IT'S A NETWORK PROBLEM

Content HAVING TO GO TO DEMEANING INTERVIEWS WITH 75 STAGES FAKE RECRUITERS FOR SHITTY SCAM COMPANIES FORCED TO USE LANGUAGES AND IDES THAT MAKE YOU SICK ALWAYS ON CALL, HAVE TO ATTEND STUPID USELESS MEETINGS CS GRADUATES FORCED TO DOXK YOUR FACE AND NAME ON COMPANY WEBSITE FOR LITERALLY NO REASON Ingflip.com FORCED TO HAVE GITHUB SO LAZY RECRUITERS CAN SEE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN A BUSY LITTLE CODE MONKEY BY YOUR GREEN SQUARES HAVING TO DEAL WITH SHIT TERMS LIKE "DEV COST" OR WHATEVER IT'S CALLED WHEN YOU HAVE TO SHIT OUT UNOPTIMIZED CODE AS FAST AS YOU CAN UNTIL YOU HATE YOURSELF FORCED TO MAKE SOCIAL MEDIA LIKE LINKEDIN AND GITHUB SO LAZY RECRUITERS HAVE TO DO O EFFORT

Content Suicide Linux 2009-02-02 by qntm You know how sometimes if you mistype a filename in Bash, it corrects your spelling and runs the command anyway? Such as when changing directory, or opening a file. I have an idea: Suicide Linux. Any time - any time - you type any remotely incorrect command, the interpreter creatively resolves it into rm -rf and wipes your hard drive. It's a game. Like walking a tightrope. You have to see how long you can continue to use the operating system before losing all your data.

The holy war of operating systems, visualized as an IQ bell curve. The average devs (middle of the curve) are crying about needing Linux for coding. Meanwhile, both the "too simple to know better" folks and the enlightened geniuses have transcended the debate entirely—one thinks OS doesn't matter, and the other has ascended to some mythical "Temple OS" plane of existence. It's the perfect illustration of programming tribalism. After 15 years in the industry, I've watched countless junior devs have existential meltdowns over OS choice while the seniors just use whatever gets the job done. And then there's that one architect who built their own custom Gentoo setup that nobody else can comprehend.

Content Whoops, it looks like you have some merge conflicts!

The Vim escape ritual—where senior devs casually drop the ":q!" bomb like it's nothing while junior devs watch in horror. That command is basically the developer equivalent of walking away from an explosion without looking back. No saving, no mercy, just pure chaotic energy. The juniors sit there wondering if this person has no fear of losing work or if they've ascended to some higher plane of existence where code is temporary but swagger is forever.