Senior Dev With No Idea

Ah yes, the classic tech startup delusion in its natural habitat! Nothing says "I'm qualified to be CTO" like casually proposing to replicate a $500 billion AI company with a budget that wouldn't even cover their coffee expenses. It's the tech equivalent of saying "I could totally beat Usain Bolt if I just had some new sneakers." Sure buddy, OpenAI only has thousands of PhDs, supercomputers, and decades of research—but you've got a MacBook Pro and an energy drink. Your investors will definitely be impressed when you deliver ChatGPT at home: "Hello wrold, how can I halp you toady?"

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The eternal truth of software development. Product managers be like "Let's remove that useful feature nobody asked for" and suddenly users are storming the gates with pitchforks. Twenty years in this industry and I've seen more "bug fixes" that were actually feature removals than actual bug fixes. The worst part? Six months later they'll reintroduce the same feature as "revolutionary new functionality" in their premium tier. Classic corporate gaslighting at its finest.

After 15 years in tech, I can confirm this pie chart is scientifically accurate. The blue slice representing "restart whatever isn't working" is basically our industry's version of percussive maintenance. That "IT placebo effect" is real too—walk into a room and suddenly the printer that's been jamming for 3 days works flawlessly. Users look at you like you're a wizard, but really you just interrupted whatever cosmic force was enjoying their suffering. And let's be honest, that quick Google search is just us typing "why the hell is [software] doing [weird thing]" and hoping someone on Stack Overflow had the same existential crisis.

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