Deadline Driven Development

Content CLIENT WANTS PER TASK TIME TRACKING FLIGHT INSTINCT INTENSIFIES

Content 8): return if(Input.isactionjustpressed("eat")fruits TrUItS as enitsignal ("getFood", fruits) if(Input.isactionjustpressed('use')): hoedTile hoedPos. find(absCursorPos) if (hoedTile ! -1 hoedValue (hoedTile 6 66 fruits3 18) TrUIts tE S enitsignal.("getFood", fruits) print (hoedValue (hoedTilel) hoedValue (hoedTile 2 plantTilenap.setcell(6,tilenap.localtonap(absCursorPos) if (hoedTile ! -1 hoedValue hoedTile 2 66 fruits 8): hoedValue (hoedTile 3 enitsignal ("getFood", fruits) plantTilenap.setcell(6,tilenap.localtonap(absCursorPos) print(fruits) if (hoedTile ! -1 hoedValue hoedTile enitsignal("water") hoedValue (hoedTile 2 await gettree0).createtiner (0.5) .tineout print ("watered") tempHoedTile hoedPos. find(absCursorPos) if (tempHoedTile ! -1 5 hoedValue (tempHoedTilel): hoedTilenap.setcell(0, tilenap. Localtonap(absCursorPos) - Vector2i.ONE, 2, Vector21(8, B)) tile tilenap.getcelltiledata(0, tilenap. localtonap(absCursorPos)) if(tile Is null S6 tile.getcustondata("canBeloed") 1 66 hoedTile enitsignal ("hoe") await gettree(.createtiner(0.5) .tineout tile tilenap.getcelltiledata(0,tilenap.Localtonap(absCursorPos)) hoedPos .append (absCursorPos) hoedValue.append(1) if(tile !s null SS tile.getcustondata("canBeHoed") 1): hoedTilenap.setcell(6,tilenap.localtonap(absCursorPos)-Vector2i.ONE,6,Vector21(3,3)) hoedTilenap. forceupdate () func physicsprocess(delta): cursorPos getglobalnouseposition() if(cursorPos.distanceto(player.position)28): cursortos e olaver Dosition. nove tomard cursorros. absCursorPos round (cursorPos16)16 cursor.position cursor.position. lerp(round(cursorPos16)16, 0.3) func ontinertineoutO): for i in range (hoedPos.size0): if (hoedValue(i 2 S hoedValue(i 6 ): plantTilenap.setcell(8,tilenap.localtonap(hoedPos() Vector2i.ONE, 0, Vector2i(HoedValueli-1, 1)) hoedValue(i1 if (hoedValue (i 2): hoedTilemap.setcell(6,tilenap.localtonap(hoedPos(1) Vector2i.ONE, 0, Vector2i(8, hoedValue fl e 1 if (hoedValue (i 6): plantTilenap set cellie. tilenao Local to man (hoedPos (al))

OH. MY. GOD. The absolute DELUSION of non-tech people thinking their programmer boyfriends are elite hackers who can destroy digital worlds! Meanwhile, the so-called "hacker boyfriend" is frantically Googling "how to declare variables in HTML" — which is LITERALLY like asking how to put water in a toaster! HTML doesn't even HAVE variables! It's a markup language! The boyfriend is so far from hacking anything he's basically trying to teach a potato to sing opera! 💀

THE ABSOLUTE BETRAYAL! 😱 Running git blame only to discover YOU were the monster all along! It's that soul-crushing moment when you dramatically unmask the villain responsible for that nightmare bug and—PLOT TWIST—it's just your past self staring back, silently judging your life choices. The digital equivalent of opening the fridge to find someone ate the last slice of pizza, and then remembering it was you at 3 AM. Self-sabotage has never been so perfectly documented!

Content Raf Rasenberg rafrasenberg 1d Offend a developer in 5 words or less 2,149 17 372 2,116 Daniel onyxcodeDan Replying to rafrasenberg 1 can program in HTML 9:24 AM 15 May 21 Twitter for Android

Content John Opdenakker jopdenakker 1 am a programmer. A journalist asked me what makes code bad. I said. No comment.