Among Us: Programming Language Edition

The ultimate job security hack: be so utterly useless that even AI doesn't want your position! When your only contribution to the codebase is comments like "// TODO: fix this later" and your Git commits consist mainly of whitespace changes, you've achieved immortality in the corporate hierarchy. The sweet irony of being simultaneously worthless yet irreplaceable is the tech industry's greatest paradox. That guy's walking away with a smile because he just realized his strategy of writing completely undocumented spaghetti code for the last five years wasn't laziness—it was career insurance!

THE ABSOLUTE DRAMA of data scientists SCREAMING at the confused cat who just doesn't get it! 💅 NumPy is THE BACKBONE of scientific computing in Python, and these people are having a COMPLETE MELTDOWN because someone dared to pronounce it "num-pee" instead of "num-pie." The AUDACITY! The HORROR! As if mispronouncing a library name is going to crash the entire matrix! Meanwhile, the cat is just sitting there, judging everyone with that blank stare like "humans and their programming problems, I literally eat kibble for a living."

Content Pranay Pathole PPathole How Programmers are portrayed in movies: white male conspicuously nerdy everything he codes works on the first try fast typist, types extra fast in programming emergencies never Googles error messages, in fact there are no error messages

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of programming languages to call these functions "random" when they're about as random as my aunt Gertrude's weekly bingo schedule! 🙄 These so-called "random" functions are LITERALLY just deterministic algorithms in disguise, honey! Feed them the same seed, and they'll spit out the exact same sequence EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. The BETRAYAL! It's like ordering a "surprise" meal but getting the same chicken sandwich for the 57th time. JUST CALL THEM WHAT THEY ARE - pseudorandom! The Matrix kid knows what's up!

Look into this little light, and you'll forget all about those 3 weeks of work you just committed to the wrong branch. git reset --hard is basically the neuralyzer of the programming world – one flash and *poof* – your code history is wiped cleaner than your browser history when your boss walks by. Sure, you could've used a softer reset or stashed your changes, but where's the thrill in that? Nothing says "I live dangerously" quite like nuclear code obliteration with no backup plan.

Content Me: I can code Friend: Dude can you hack someon- shut