The Only Purpose Internet Explorer Serves

OH. MY. GOD. The absolute IRONY! Microsoft finally stops supporting Windows 10, and instead of panicking, these users are having the time of their LIVES! 🎉 After years of being held hostage by those incessant "Your computer needs to restart to install updates" messages that ALWAYS pop up when you're in the middle of something important, Windows 10 users are celebrating their newfound freedom like they've just been released from digital prison! Sure, they might be running an unsupported OS that's basically a ticking security time bomb, but hey—at least they can finish that compilation without Windows deciding it's the PERFECT moment for a 20-minute update! Living dangerously has never felt so satisfying!

Microsoft announces they'll stop selling Windows 10 product keys, and the entire developer community collectively shrugs while adjusting their pirate hats. Because let's be real—who's actually been buying Windows keys at full price? Between gray market keys for $5, corporate volume licenses that mysteriously multiply, and the fact that Windows basically activates itself if you stare at it long enough, this announcement has all the impact of a semicolon in Python. The "OH NO! ANYWAY" format perfectly captures how developers feel about Microsoft's licensing theatrics. They've been playing whack-a-mole with activation for decades while we've been out here running unactivated copies with that little watermark like it's a badge of honor. Plus, most devs are either on Linux, using their company's license, or have already moved to Windows 11 (willingly or not). Fun fact: Windows activation has been "cracked" so many times that Microsoft basically gave up and made Windows 10 free to upgrade to back in 2015. The pirate hat is just chef's kiss—a visual representation of every developer's relationship with Microsoft licensing since the dawn of time.

Even Death can't kill Internet Explorer properly. The Grim Reaper shows up with his "It's time to go" speech, but IE just freezes with the classic "Internet Explorer is not responding" message. The ultimate irony - a browser so slow it can't even die on time. Microsoft's digital cockroach somehow outlived its usefulness by a decade yet still managed to be the default browser for corporate America until IT finally got permission to upgrade... to Edge.

OH. MY. GOD. Microsoft has reached peak simplification nirvana! 🙄 Why use descriptive, specific terms when you can just call LITERALLY EVERYTHING an "app"?! Remote Desktop? Too specific! Operating system? Too technical! Daemon? Too scary-sounding! Just slap "app" on it and call it a day! The absolute TRAGEDY of trying to Google "Windows App not connecting" and getting 8 million results about the Weather app! It's like Microsoft is DELIBERATELY trying to make troubleshooting an Olympic sport! Next up: they'll rename their entire company to "Thing" and their logo to a generic square. PERFECTION! 💅

Content -push to remote needs ssh -ssh needs 1password -1password needs windows hello -windows hello needs biometrics authentication so now every time I push to remote I stare at my laptop like

Content 4pm wake up 5pm ( Email boss that project will be delayed 6pm Label yesterdays code as deprecated 7pmBEER TIME 8pm malloc(LONGLONGMAX, 9pm include windows.hs to triple compile time 10pm Obfuscate dev branch Upm Bully Rust users online 12pm Remove tests Tam Deploy (friday only) 2am Gn