Resume padding Memes

Posts tagged with Resume padding

Hope To Conquer The World
Programming Rust
3 days ago 64.7K views 0 shares
Hope To Conquer The World
BEHOLD! The sacred ritual of the unemployed coder! There they stand, fist raised dramatically to the heavens, as if writing "Hello World" in yet another language will somehow transform them from jobless keyboard warrior to tech billionaire overnight! The AUDACITY! The DRAMA! The sheer DELUSION that learning your 27th programming language will finally be the one that makes recruiters slide into your DMs! Meanwhile, their LinkedIn profile weeps silently in the corner as they ignore actual marketable skills to master printing text to a console in Rust. Revolutionary stuff, truly.

Updating My CV As We Speak
Git Webdev Programming
5 days ago 67.9K views 0 shares
Updating My CV As We Speak
Ah, the classic "one-line commit to fame" pipeline! Nothing says "senior developer material" like fixing a typo in the README and immediately updating your LinkedIn with "Core Contributor at Major FOSS Project." The best part? That single docs update probably took 3 hours of fighting with the project's arcane contribution guidelines, two rejected PRs, and a heated discussion about Oxford commas in the issue tracker. But hey, that GitHub green square is worth its weight in gold during job interviews!

Added To My Resume After Ten Minutes Of Coding
Programming Rust
15 days ago 78.0K views 0 shares
Added To My Resume After Ten Minutes Of Coding
The instant transformation from coding noob to "seasoned polyglot" is a sacred developer tradition. Copy-paste a "Hello World" example, struggle with the compiler for 20 minutes, then suddenly you're "proficient" in Rust on LinkedIn. The Squirtle squad here perfectly represents junior devs strutting into interviews with their resume listing 17 languages they've used exactly once. Meanwhile, hiring managers are desperately trying to find someone who actually knows how to reverse a linked list without Googling it first.

Added To My Resume After Ten Minutes Of Coding
Programming
1 month ago 74.9K views 0 shares
Added To My Resume After Ten Minutes Of Coding
The Squirtle Squad of resume padding. Copy-pasting "print('Hello World')" in Rust and suddenly you're a "systems programming specialist with low-level memory management experience." Meanwhile, actual Rust developers watching you struggle to explain lifetimes during the interview. The classic "fake it till you make it" approach, except you never actually make it past the technical screening.

What I Say
Programming Python
1 month ago 80.6K views 0 shares
What I Say
The gap between résumé and reality has never been so elegantly exposed. Sure, you're "multilingual" in programming... if copying the same print() statement and changing "Hello World" to different languages counts as fluency. It's like claiming you're a polyglot because you can say "where's the bathroom?" in five countries. The universal programmer flex that falls apart the moment someone asks you to implement a binary tree in any of those "languages" you supposedly know.

Update Read Me
Git Programming
1 month ago 103.1K views 0 shares
Update Read Me
Ah, the classic "green squares at any cost" syndrome. Nothing says "I'm a serious developer" like obsessively committing README formatting changes 30 times an hour just to make your GitHub contribution graph look like a lush rainforest. What you're witnessing is the digital equivalent of a peacock's mating dance - except instead of attracting mates, you're desperately trying to impress potential employers who might glance at your profile for 2.7 seconds. Trust me, after 20 years in this industry, I can tell you that no one has ever been hired because they had perfect markdown indentation in their README. But hey, at least your contribution graph looks like you've been coding like a maniac while you were actually just adding and removing spaces.