Backend developer hanging out with the Frontend team.

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Two hooded figures from Planet of the Apes smugly declaring "Ah, victory" while your IDE lights up like a Christmas tree with warnings about unused imports. Meanwhile, you're frantically commenting out code you'll need next week because the linter won't shut up and the build pipeline is failing. Sure, the codebase looks cleaner, but we all know you're just going to re-import everything in three days when requirements change again.

Content Hacker Scripts Based on a true story: xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that. xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy" xxx: You're gonna love this xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login. xxX: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time". xxX: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling wellgonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am. xxX: (and the oscar goes to) fucking-coffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens a telnet session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has a TCP socket up and running) and sends something like sys brew. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk. xxx: holy sht I'm keeping those

Nothing screams "legacy codebase" quite like a footer that still says "© 2022" in the year 2025. The irony here is beautiful: a product claiming to solve the problem of outdated copyright years... while displaying an outdated copyright year in its own footer. It's like a fitness app with a broken step counter or a spell-checker with typos in its marketing. The real kicker? They're marketing this as "Product of the day 46th" while simultaneously proving they need their own product. Either they haven't launched yet, or they're running the most meta marketing campaign in history. Pro tip: if you're selling a solution to automatically update copyright years, maybe start by using it on your own site. Just a thought.

Content SOMETIMES WHEN PROGRAMMING IN JAVA SCRIPT JUST WANT TO YELL "TUCKTHIS BUTICANT REMEMBER WHAT "THIS REFERS TO

Ah, the pinnacle of modern tech innovation - changing a loading spinner's text and suddenly becoming an AI company. Because apparently all it takes to join the AI gold rush is making your users think your app is "thinking" instead of just, you know, fetching data from a database. This is the software equivalent of putting on glasses to look smarter. Next week they'll add rainbow colors to the spinner and become a "quantum computing startup." Venture capitalists, please form an orderly queue with your checkbooks ready.