Atwood's Law: The JavaScript Singularity

Global variables are the chaotic neutral entities of programming—existing everywhere and nowhere simultaneously. When you interrogate one about its memory allocation, it just stares back with those creepy wolf eyes: "I'm neither stack nor heap but another secret third thing." It's like that roommate who somehow lives in your apartment but never pays rent or shows up on the lease. The memory management gods are watching, and they're judging your life choices.

THE ABSOLUTE HORROR of ordering pizza as a developer! Papa John's out here with their "{NAME}" and "{userEmail}" placeholders just raw-dogging it in production! 😱 The eternal struggle between hunger and witnessing someone's template variables that never got replaced. Meanwhile that little loading spinner is probably making a desperate API call to nowhere because SOMEONE FORGOT TO VALIDATE THE FORM DATA. The pizza might arrive, but my faith in their codebase certainly won't. And don't get me started on "Loading pick up info..." – honey, you can't pick up what your variables couldn't put down! 💅

Content when someone ask you what programming language they should learn, don't simply answer the one you prefer. first ask them what area they plan to focus on. for example: web frontend: javascript backend: javascript mobile apps: javascript games: javascript ai: javascript

This right here is what happens when your UI designer and frontend dev hate each other. The month selector is split into three columns of gibberish syllables that you have to mentally reassemble like some deranged word puzzle. "J-octo-ber"? "Nov-em-y"? And let's not forget the default values: day 0 of the year 1900. Because nothing says "user-friendly" like making people born on January 1st, 1900 feel right at home while everyone else suffers. This form is the digital equivalent of asking someone their birthday in interpretive dance.

Ah, the apocalyptic quartet of syntax that makes developers question their career choices! Double equals comparing to true is like wearing socks with sandals - technically works but why would you do that? Just use the boolean directly! The null check with ?? that shows up uninvited in every codebase like that one relative at family gatherings who keeps asking why you're still single. Double exclamation marks on booleans - because apparently one wasn't dramatic enough to convert values to boolean. It's the coding equivalent of saying "REALLY REALLY" to emphasize your point. And that empty for loop with just a semicolon? Pure chaos. The kind of code that makes senior devs develop eye twitches during code reviews. These four horsemen don't just signal the end of readable code - they're the reason why Stack Overflow exists.

Content Giulio Carrara 3rd Software Engineer 1d g Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS - nix system administration - Git and CI with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer. That's an entire IT department. Yours truly 8,801 391 comments ProarammerHumor.io