This Is Me

Programming languages Code conversion Developer life Tech evangelism Jvm Modern languages

Java Programming Kotlin

20 days ago 294,576 views 0 shares

This Is Me

java-memes, kotlin-memes, programming-languages-memes, code-conversion-memes, developer-life-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Oh honey, the DESPERATION is real! Our Java programmer is just vibing alone at the urinal, living their best verbose life. Then a Kotlin programmer walks in and suddenly it's like spotting a unicorn in the wild. The Java dev IMMEDIATELY swoops in with that "Switch to Kotlin Bro" pitch like they've been waiting their entire career for this moment. It's giving "I've seen the light and I need to save you from your own verbosity" energy. Nothing says "I have regrets about my life choices" quite like cornering someone at a urinal to evangelize about null safety and coroutines. Sir, this is a bathroom, not a tech conference!

More Like This

JavaScript is pronounced E-C-M-A Script

Java Javascript php Linux Databases

2 years ago 321.0K views 0 shares

JavaScript is pronounced E-C-M-A Script | javascript-memes, java-memes, server-memes, mysql-memes, sql-memes, sql server-memes, postgresql-memes, oracle-memes, nginx-memes, postgres-memes, mac-memes, kubernetes-memes, twitter-memes, retweet-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content Randolph West S randolphwest "nginx" is pronounced "Engine-X" "PostgreSQL" is pronounced "Post- gres" "MySQL" is pronounced "My-S-Q-L" "SQL Server" is pronounced "Sequel Server" "Kubernetes" is pronounced "Koober-netties" "SAP" is pronounced "S-A-p" "Oracle" is pronounced "Fetch the chequebook" 9:41 PM 4220 Twitter for Mac 1,868 Retweets 6,303 Likes 17 1 Proard

Hackerman

Java Backend

1 year ago 49.2K views 0 shares

HACKERMAN | java-memes, hacker-memes, program-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content When you can now make a Hello World program in java in just under 2 hours SALTED CARAMA JAVA MONSTER COFFEEENERGY

ssss sssss ssssss sssss

Java Python Backend

2 years ago 65.1K views 0 shares

ssss sssss ssssss sssss | java-memes, python-memes, array-memes, exception-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content 45 points 11 hours ago Hi, is this the krusty krab? Reply Give Award Share Report Save 22 points 6 hours ago Yes, may I take your order? Reply Give Award Share Report Save 7 points 3 hours ago Ill take a, Reply Give Award Share Report Save 21 points 3 hours ago Exception in thread "main" java.lang.ArrayIndexOutOfBoundsException: 5 at Order.main(Order java:5) Reply Give Award Share Report Save 3 points 3 hours ago can you translate that to python Reply Give Award Share Report Save 18 points 2 hours ago SSSSSSSSS SSSSSS SSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSS Reply Give Award Share Report Save

Same Pay More Work

Java AWS Backend Cloud

1 year ago 96.6K views 0 shares

samePayMoreWork | java-memes, backend-memes, aws-memes, devops-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content aws?? in a java backend team?? how queer!! I've never seen such a thing - i must inquire about this further with my supervisor post-haste! aws Java lava lava i guess we doin devops now Java lava aws java

Hello world!

Java Android Python Databases Frontend

3 years ago 126.5K views 0 shares

<div class="print">Hello world!</div> | developer-memes, html-memes, code-memes, android-memes, program-memes, xcode-memes, class-memes, rds-memes, ML-memes, div-memes, twitter-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content Raf Rasenberg rafrasenberg 1d Offend a developer in 5 words or less 2,149 2 372 2,116 Daniel onyxcodeDan Replying to rafrasenberg I can program in HTML 9:24 AM 15 May 21 Twitter for Android

I'm getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea. ss

Java Javascript Programming php Python

3 years ago 301.1K views 1 shares

I'm getting second thoughts about whether accepting this job was a good idea. ss | html-memes, code-memes, php-memes, design-memes, cms-memes, version-memes, django-memes, xml-memes, oracle-memes, function-memes, facebook-memes, warning-memes, error-memes, fix-memes, cli-memes, jar-memes, IT-memes, component-memes, idea-memes, ide-memes, ML-memes, header-memes, vm-memes, comment-memes, framework-memes, manager-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

Content ?php header ("Content-type: texthtml; charsetutf-8"); This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code. I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing using a Base setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS. The very long BaseX script, very long PH presenter and very long XSLT stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I bet they have mismatches somewhere. Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice: Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment. Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world and hope it will be enough. Farewell. error reporting (E ALL); ini set ("display errors", true); print('?xml version"1.0" encodina"UTF-8" ?'. "In"):?