The Upgrade: Microsoft's Revenge Child

Content Java: Don't worry about memory leaks, we have a special program for that. Garbage collector does that for you C My brother, you are the garbage collector

Content my linkedin profile R, python, javascript, shiny, dplyr, purrr, ditto, egplot, d3, canvas, spark, sawk, pyspark, sparkly, lodash, lazy, bootstrap, jupyter, vulpix, git, flask, numpy, pandas, feebas, scikit, pm, bayes, h2o.ai, sparkling-water, tensorflow, keras, onyx, ekans, hadoop, scala, unity, metapod, gG, cc, krebase, neo4j, hadoop. I typically ask recruiters to point out which of these are pokemon.

So Markdown just casually went from "barely registering on the chart" to "I'm about to end Python's whole career" in like 2 years? Someone's clearly been feeding their README files steroids. The graph shows Markdown's popularity shooting up at a near-vertical angle around 2022, threatening to overtake every actual programming language on the chart. Plot twist: Markdown isn't even a programming language. It's a markup language. That's like saying Microsoft Word is competing with C++ because people write documentation in it. But hey, according to PYPL (PopularitY of Programming Language), apparently writing **bold text** and # headers now qualifies you as a software engineer. The real question: Did someone accidentally include every GitHub README, Stack Overflow post, and Discord message in their dataset? Because that's the only way this makes sense. Next year's chart will probably show HTML as the "hottest new programming language" with SQL making a surprise comeback as "the future of coding."

When your error handling is so robust it involves throwing babies across a canyon. The try block launches Baby(), the catch block is desperately reaching to handle it, and the finally block? Just sitting there at the bottom, guaranteed to execute whether the baby gets caught or not. The finally block doesn't care about your success or failure—it's just there to clean up resources and probably call CPS. The visual metaphor here is chef's kiss: the sheer distance between try and catch represents that one function in your codebase where the exception could come from literally anywhere in a 500-line method, and you're just hoping your generic catch block somehow handles it gracefully. Meanwhile, finally is down there like "I'm running regardless, hope you closed those database connections."

The rest of the world celebrates as Java marches forward to version 25, while our hero sits smugly at a café, sipping his drink, completely unbothered about upgrading from Java 8. Why fix what isn't broken? Enterprise developers know the secret sauce of software stability: never touch a working production environment. Meanwhile, the Java community is out there having a parade for features they'll probably never use. That's the beauty of legacy systems – they outlive the developers who built them, the managers who approved them, and possibly several civilizations.

Content Most people rejected His message. You can't use Javascript for everything Shut up! They hated Jesus because He told them the truth. Gal. 4:16