Must Be Doing Java

Content "Then she forced me to code in Javascript" - Johnny Depp

Oh, the classic "I'll definitely use getters and setters properly this time" delusion! Every developer swears they'll implement proper encapsulation, then 10 years later realizes they've written exactly zero getters that actually do anything besides return value; . We all pretend we're writing enterprise-grade code that might need validation later, but deep down we know we're just adding extra keystrokes to feel professional. The angry face at the end is just perfect - nothing triggers developer rage quite like being confronted with our own coding hypocrisy.

That moment of crushing disappointment when your excitement gets brutally murdered by context. You thought you found another Java dev in the wild discussing the JRE (Java Runtime Environment), only to discover they're just talking about some podcast where people yell at each other for three hours. The betrayal is written all over that face - the face of a developer who momentarily thought they found someone who understood their daily pain of "JAR hell" and ClassLoader nightmares. Back to being the only one at the party who knows what a garbage collector actually is.

Content Just because I like Java doesn't mean I am bad at memory management I MEAN I am bad at memory management But not because I like Java

Content Nick Zorchenhimer When your company pays you for each line The Production Code: public static bool CompareBooleans (bool orig, bool val) return AreBooleansEqual (orig, val); internal static bool AreBooleansEqual(bool orig, bool val) if(orig val) return false; return trues 12:54 AM 31 May 19 Twitter Web Client 2,519 Retweets 7,054 Likes 17 8

Content BEWARE OF THE PIPELINE Python Java C C C 2 0 1 7 2018 2 0 19 2 0 2 0 2 0 2 1