The Unholy Alliance Of GPU Manufacturers

Listen, I'm not saying I'd get in immediately, but I'd definitely walk closer to check if they're legit. DDR5 prices are still ridiculous and my Chrome tabs are eating through my current 16GB like a college student through ramen. The sketchy van aesthetic just adds authenticity—real hardware dealers don't need fancy marketing. They know you'll come crawling when your system starts swapping to disk during a Zoom call.

Ah, the rare sighting of computers in their natural aquatic environment! What we're witnessing here is a classic case of hardware returning to the wild. These vintage machines aren't just taking a swim—they're phishing , the pun being the perfect blend of "fishing" and "phishing" (those malicious attempts to steal your credentials that flood your inbox daily). Those old beige boxes have finally escaped the corporate cubicles where they spent decades processing TPS reports, only to end up in this swampy retirement home. Honestly, still better working conditions than most IT departments I've seen. Nature is healing. The computers are returning to the water. Next time your IT guy says "have you tried turning it off and on again," just throw it in the nearest pond instead.

When tech enthusiasts insist you switch to DisplayPort for that extra 3.7% performance boost you'll never notice, but your entire setup is already wired with HDMI cables that work perfectly fine. It's like being lectured by the audiophile who can "definitely hear the difference" in their $500 cables while you just want to play Minecraft without rewiring your entire apartment. Yes, DisplayPort might support higher refresh rates and resolutions in certain scenarios, but for 99% of us, HDMI's got what we crave - convenience and cables we already own.

The classic Nintendo GameCube died in 2006, but its "reincarnation" in 2026 is just... a literal black cube. Minimalism gone too far? This is what happens when product designers take "return to your roots" too literally. Twenty years of innovation and we've circled back to "box that plays games" but without any of the personality. Next they'll remove the controller and call it "intuitive gesture control" while charging you double.

OH. MY. GOD. Someone took "thumb drive" WAY too literally! Instead of using an actual USB flash drive to update their BIOS like a normal human being, this tech rebel just JAMMED THEIR ACTUAL THUMB into the computer port! The audacity! The innovation! The sheer disregard for basic computer anatomy! I'm having heart palpitations just looking at this hardware violation. Next thing you know they'll be "installing more RAM" by shoving a sheep into their PC case. THE HORROR!

Behold, the dark arts of firmware programming. What we're seeing here is a function pointer declaration that would make C purists weep into their mechanical keyboards. It's the coding equivalent of duct-taping a rocket to a shopping cart—technically it works, but nobody's proud of it. The syntax is so convoluted that even the compiler probably needs therapy after parsing it. This is what happens when you code at 3 AM fueled by nothing but energy drinks and desperation.