RIP My Subpixel: He Was A Real G

Back in the 60s, programmers were literally PUNCHING CODE into cards by hand! 🤯 The person in the image is holding up punch cards with the caption "COMPILERS TOOK MY JOB" - it's basically the original "robots are stealing our jobs" but for coding! Before compilers existed, humans had to manually convert code into machine-readable formats. Then BAM! Compilers showed up and were like "I got this" and an entire profession vanished faster than free pizza at a hackathon! Those punch card operators never saw it coming!

The paranoid tech veteran's approach to data security: physically removing the hard drive platters. Sure, you could use DBAN or a hammer, but where's the satisfaction in that? This is like bringing a tactical nuke to a knife fight—complete overkill that would make any security auditor simultaneously applaud and facepalm. For the uninitiated, those metal discs (platters) are where your embarrassing browser history and collection of half-finished side projects actually live. No platters = no evidence of that framework you started building in 2018 and abandoned after three commits. Bonus points for the "I was bored" justification—the universal explanation for both brilliant engineering solutions and catastrophic tech disasters since the dawn of computing.

Ah, Best Buy bringing back the Y2K38 apocalypse warnings. That sticker is telling you to shut down your computer before 03:14:07 on January 19, 2038 – when 32-bit Unix timestamps roll over and potentially brick everything running on them. Just like Y2K but with fewer panic bunkers and more GitHub issues. At this point, I'm more worried about my code from last sprint than some timestamp issue 14 years from now. Though I'm impressed anyone thinks my ThinkPad will still boot by then.

Oh. My. GAWD. The absolute TRAVESTY of PC building ignorance on display here! 😱 This nephew is committing CARDINAL SINS of hardware understanding - locking his refresh rate at 144Hz while running 1080p (as if that's some technical achievement), drooling over prebuilts when REAL enthusiasts build their own, and claiming he needs more RGB (because obviously more rainbow lights = more computing power). The final nail in this coffin of tech sacrilege? He thinks upgrading from a 3060 Ti to a 4060 is worth bragging about. Honey, that's barely an upgrade - it's like trading your 2015 Honda Civic for a 2016 Honda Civic and calling yourself a car enthusiast! 💅

Ah, the circle of PC life. In 2020, you buy a prebuilt with mediocre specs—ASRock motherboard, 8GB RAM, GT 710 GPU, Ryzen 3 3100, and an unbranded PSU just waiting to explode. Fast forward to 2025, and everything has died except that stubborn 1TB hard drive, which somehow outlived its far more expensive companions. It's like buying a Ferrari but five years later all you have left is the cup holder. Hard drives: too slow to die, too stubborn to upgrade.

The AUDACITY of CPU temperature distribution! Left side: normal humans SWEATING BULLETS at 70°C thinking their computer is about to spontaneously combust. Middle: the statistical bell curve of temperatures showing most CPUs operate around 85-100°C. Right side: those PSYCHOPATHIC GENIUSES with their hoodies pulled up, casually declaring "80C is fine" while their machines are practically melting through their desks. The duality of PC users is SENDING ME! Some of us are calling 911 when the fan gets loud while others are like "145°C? Just needs more thermal paste, sweetie! 💅"