Trolling Future Self With Commits

version control Technical debt Code quality Commit messages Game-physics Developer-sanity

Git Programming Debugging Gamedev Unity

6 months ago 198,798 views 0 shares

Trolling Future Self With Commits

git-memes, commit-messages-memes, gamedev-memes, debugging-memes, code-quality-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

The evolution of commit messages is the programmer's descent into madness. First panel: "Bugfix" - the bare minimum effort when you just want to go home. Second panel: "102: Fixed double-jump" - slightly better, at least there's a ticket number. Third panel: "fix: double-jump bug in PlayerController; resolves issue #102" - the brief moment of professionalism when you think someone might actually read your commits. Fourth panel: "Lots of changes lol; Fixed low key sus double-jump yeeting players off map; also fire refactor of all movement physics fr" - the complete breakdown where you're mixing conventional commits with stream-of-consciousness ramblings and Gen Z slang. This is what happens at 3 AM when you've been debugging the same issue since yesterday and your brain is running on energy drinks and spite.

More Like This

The Ultimate Developer Correction Service

Git Webdev Programming

1 month ago 162.5K views 0 shares

The Ultimate Developer Correction Service

The peak of developer pettiness has been achieved! Someone registered guthib.com just to tell people they misspelled GitHub. It's basically the digital equivalent of buying a billboard outside your ex's house that says "YOU'RE WRONG." The commitment to correct other people's typos has reached enterprise-level funding. Imagine the satisfaction of checking your server logs and seeing thousands of confused developers who fat-fingered their way to your passive-aggressive domain. The ultimate "well, actually" move that cost $12/year plus hosting. Worth. Every. Penny.

Unverified Git User But Still Works

Git Security Devops Programming

5 months ago 176.8K views 0 shares

Unverified Git User But Still Works

Prison interrogation scene but make it Git security theater! The tiny dev confesses to replacing Latin letters with Cyrillic lookalikes to bypass Git commit verification and push code using their boss's identity. It's that classic security exploit where "paypal.com" and "pаypal.com" look identical but the second one has a Cyrillic 'а'. The perfect crime for when you need to blame production bugs on someone with a corner office. Commit signature verification? More like commit signature suggestion .

I Miss My Programming Babies

Git Webdev Programming

2 months ago 156.0K views 0 shares

I Miss My Programming Babies

The eternal struggle of a developer's vacation: lying in bed trying to relax while your brain keeps reaching for that framed reminder of all the half-baked GitHub repos you've abandoned. That sweet, sweet dopamine hit of starting a new project is long gone, but the guilt of abandonment follows you to the beach. Your code children are crying out "Daddy, why haven't you committed to us in 8 months?" Meanwhile you're pretending to enjoy coconut drinks while secretly wondering if your brilliant "Uber for houseplants" idea could actually work if you just refactored the backend...

Following Vulkan Tutorial

Git Gamedev C++ Programming

4 months ago 251.2K views 0 shares

Following Vulkan Tutorial

The classic GitHub commit message that says it all. When diving into Vulkan (that notoriously complex graphics API that makes OpenGL look like a children's toy), this dev's only documentation is a README file warning potential recruiters about the horror show inside. It's the programming equivalent of those "Abandon All Hope" signs at the entrance to Hell. The best part? They committed it just 3 minutes ago - probably right after realizing their code is an unholy abomination that would make even seasoned graphics programmers weep.

Too Real To Be Comfortable

Git Webdev Programming Debugging Frontend

7 months ago 190.8K views 0 shares

Too Real To Be Comfortable

This is what happens when you open that project from your GitHub graveyard. That tangled mess of wires perfectly captures the horror of revisiting your old code—a chaotic nightmare that somehow worked but you have absolutely no idea how. The poor soul climbing into that disaster is all of us trying to add "just one small feature" to code we wrote before we knew better. It's like archaeological excavation, except instead of treasure you find comments like "//fix this later" and functions named "temp_solution_final_v3_ACTUALLY_FINAL".

Straight Up Pushing It

Git Devops Programming Debugging

5 months ago 157.0K views 0 shares

Straight Up Pushing It

The eternal Git confession we all make but never admit to. You know that moment when you've been wrestling with merge conflicts for two hours, documentation is just a suggestion, and suddenly git push -f starts looking like a completely reasonable life choice? That's this meme in its purest form. The "it" being pushed is both the code AND the responsibility for whatever chaos ensues. The typo in "JUSTR" is just *chef's kiss* - perfectly representing the frantic energy of someone who's about to nuke the remote repository while muttering "I'll fix it in production."