The Last .Gitignore You Will Ever Need

Ah, the classic merge conflict in its natural habitat! When nature decides to implement its own version control system and the tree refuses to rebase. The metal grate tried to follow a nice, orderly pattern until this stubborn trunk came along with its own implementation. Now we've got this chaotic mess in the middle that nobody wants to resolve manually. Just like when Dave pushes directly to master at 4:59pm on Friday and ruins everyone's weekend. The tree's basically saying "I'm not moving my code for your architecture decisions" and honestly, I respect that level of commitment.

The genius wordplay here is killing me. While the tech world obsesses over "full stack developers" (those mythical unicorns who can handle both frontend and backend), this guy proudly declares himself a "pull stack developer" - someone whose primary skill is copying code from Stack Overflow and random GitHub repos. Let's be honest, we're all pull stack developers on those days when deadlines loom and caffeine levels drop. The difference is most of us don't put it on our LinkedIn profiles. This tweet is basically the programmer equivalent of "I'm not a chef, I just heat up frozen meals and arrange them nicely on plates." 5,079 likes because truth hurts, but honesty deserves upvotes.

Nothing triggers impostor syndrome quite like scrolling through GitHub and finding Luigi here with dual CS degrees from an Ivy League school, 3500 followers, and probably a contribution graph that looks like a Manhattan skyline. Meanwhile, you're still struggling to center a div and your most impressive achievement is fixing a bug by restarting your computer. The cherry on top? He's probably 22 and already has FAANG offers while you're surviving on Stack Overflow copypasta and praying nobody reviews your code too carefully. But hey, at least you know how to exit Vim... sometimes.

Ah, the glorious transformation that happens when your pull request finally gets merged! You start as a nervous junior dev in a plain suit, questioning your life choices and code quality. Then BAM—suddenly you're royalty, adorned with medals of honor and sitting on the throne of Git superiority. The best part? That awkward moment when you submit a PR at 11:59 PM with 17 commented-out debug statements and a commit message that just says "fix stuff" – and somehow it still gets approved. Instant transformation from peasant to king of the codebase! And yes, all my repos are public too... which means everyone can witness both my moments of coding brilliance and the absolute dumpster fires I create before the PR gets polished. It's like having your teenage photos permanently displayed in Times Square.

Ah, the unholy trinity of developer nightmares presented as dark magic symbols! These three commands represent career-ending mistakes that haunt the dreams of tech professionals: DROP DATABASE - The database equivalent of a tactical nuke. One second your data exists, the next second your resume is being updated. rm -rf /* - The Linux command that says "I'd like everything on this system deleted, please and thank you." Hope you enjoyed having files! git push --force - The team collaboration destroyer. Nothing says "my code is more important than everyone else's work" quite like overwriting the shared repository history. Execute any of these in production without a backup, and you might as well start practicing the phrase "Would you like fries with that?"

OMG, it's the ULTIMATE developer battle cry! 💀 "Deploy First, Pray Later" - because who needs testing when you have BLIND FAITH and ENERGY DRINKS?! The cute little praying bunny is all of us at 4:57 PM on Friday when someone says "let's push to production!" Meanwhile, that subtitle "god abandoned this pipeline long ago" is the tragic reality check your CI/CD process desperately needed. Your deployment strategy shouldn't require divine intervention, but here we are... FRANTICALLY LIGHTING CANDLES while production burns!