The Underappreciated Heroes Of Code

Ah yes, the pinnacle of debugging sophistication. Why spend 20 minutes configuring breakpoints and stepping through code when you can just pepper your codebase with Debug.Log("asdfasdf") and watch the console like it's reality TV? Sure, your senior developer might judge you for not using "proper" debugging techniques, but nothing beats the raw efficiency of keyboard-mashing a string that stands out in the log. If it works, it works. And let's be honest, we all know which line hit when we see "asdfasdf" scroll by.

Grandma heard you like "computer games" and bought you a Steam Deck thinking it's a new Nintendo! Now you've got a portable Linux machine that can run your entire Steam library, debug Docker containers, and maybe even finish that side project you've been avoiding. The best part? You can pretend you're playing games while secretly writing code in Vim. Grandparents accidentally turning their grandkids into terminal-loving power users since 2022.

The sweet, sweet dopamine rush of getting those first 40 downloads on your passion project! That formal announcement energy when your GitHub repo finally gets noticed by someone other than your alt accounts. Game modders live for those metrics—each download representing a real human who thought "yeah, I'll give this random internet person's code a try on my perfectly functioning game." The elegant frog just makes it 10x funnier because that's exactly how you feel announcing your minor achievement in the Discord server where everyone else is sharing their 10k+ download milestones.

You've been putting off that Steam library for years because GPUs cost more than your rent and RAM prices made you question your life choices. But now? Now the hardware gods have smiled upon you. Suddenly those 570+ games you bought during sales "for later" are looking real attractive. Who needs new releases when you've got a perfectly good backlog from 2015 that you can finally run at more than 15 FPS? The embrace is real. The wallet recovery begins.

The eternal battle between game companies and Valve's Steam platform in one perfect image. On the left, major publishers (EA, Ubisoft, Microsoft, etc.) screaming bloody murder while Steam casually responds with "I like to provide good discounts and customer service" alongside that sweet -95% tag. It's basically the gaming industry's version of that meeting where someone suggests actually making customers happy and gets thrown out the window. The difference is Steam actually did it and now has everyone's wallet in a stranglehold.

Ah yes, the classic "just code it in Assembly" solution! Because nothing says "I'm desperate for performance" like abandoning all modern conveniences and diving straight into the metal. FPS dropping in your RollerCoaster Tycoon clone? Forget optimizing your existing code! Just rewrite the entire thing in Assembly with zero libraries, no engine, no team support—just you and 500,000 lines of raw machine instructions. Who needs sleep or sanity when you can manually manage every register and memory address? The irony is that some legendary games like RollerCoaster Tycoon were actually written mostly in Assembly by programming wizards. But those people weren't normal humans—they were coding deities who probably dreamed in opcodes.