Can't Forget That DOCTYPE Declaration

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The spy who came in from the code. This mashup of JSON formatting and the Jason Bourne franchise is the crossover nobody asked for but everyone needed. The perfect agent doesn't exist in a string or an array—he exists in an object literal with his identity unknown but his threat level at maximum. He'll track down your parsing errors faster than a rogue CIA operative, and he'll do it all with properly formatted key-value pairs. The only thing more dangerous than a trained assassin is one with valid syntax.

Congratulations on your corporate developer position! Your six-figure salary now compensates you for the thrilling adventures of: • Spending 3 hours waiting for IT to grant you access to a system you need for 5 minutes of work • Sitting through meetings that could've been emails while secretly coding your side project • Mastering proprietary tools built by someone who left 7 years ago with zero documentation • The exhilarating cycle of changing a button from blue to slightly-less-blue, then back again because "the VP didn't like it" • Rearranging JSON only to put it back exactly how it was because "there's a bug somewhere" • Frozen in carbonite during release freezes while your productivity slowly suffocates • Teaching interns how to use tools you barely understand yourself • Changing passwords every 30 days to increasingly complex combinations that you'll inevitably store in a text file called "definitely_not_passwords.txt" But hey, the coffee's free! (When the machine works.)