I Introduced It Myself

The function loops through ALL USERS to find one with matching credentials instead of using a proper query. The comment is the chef's kiss: "This only works because there are not many users." It's like saying "my car doesn't need brakes because I don't drive fast." Bonus security nightmare: they're storing password hashes but comparing them directly instead of hashing the input password first. This authentication is basically a time bomb wrapped in spaghetti code!

Ah, JavaScript's default sorting—where even emoji faces aren't safe from algorithmic bias. The code innocently calls sort() on an array of diverse face emojis, but without a compare function, JS sorts by Unicode values. Somehow the browser decided to arrange them by skin tone from lightest to darkest. Not exactly what the developer intended, but a perfect example of why you should always specify your sorting criteria. Remember kids: computers don't understand social context—they just follow instructions, however problematic the results may be.

The counter shows negative one days since the last timezone issue, which means we're literally having timezone problems from the future . That's the special hell of distributed systems—you've got bugs arriving before you even write the code. Time zones are the eternal punishment for developers who thought "how hard could date handling be?" Spoiler: it's a nightmare wrapped in an enigma served with a side of daylight saving exceptions.

You know that split second between hovering over "Commit and Push" and actually clicking it? That's when your entire life flashes before your eyes. Did you test it? Nope. Did you write tests? Absolutely not. Did you even read what you changed? Who has time for that? But here you are, about to yeet your code directly into production because you're 90% sure it works and honestly, that's better odds than most things in life. The "Commit and Push" button is basically the programming equivalent of "do you feel lucky, punk?" and the answer is always a confident "probably?" The sweaty guy on the phone perfectly captures that moment when you realize your push is going straight to main branch and there's no staging environment to catch your mistakes. Time to grip those armrests and hope your regex didn't just delete the entire user database.

Content Version History 9.6 We flew too close to the sun. This update contains bug fixes and performance improvements. 1w ago 9.4.1 1m ago We've done it. This version is the perfect app. All future changes will be hubris moving us further from the ideal.

Content When you fix that tedious bug one day before the release date uvo.krishna.me Sr. Management Manager Me Lead