Hmm Ok But Why Not Make It To 0

Content Vishal VishalMalvi Today's forecast for me as a developer: - 40 trapped in meetings. - 10 pretending to enjoy Fun Friday activity. - 30 coding like a boss. - 10 debugging nightmare - 10 staring blankly at the screen wondering if I'm the problem or the code is just being a devil. ProdrammerHumor.io

Content After thousands of applications, I just accepted an offer from a McFAANG company! Shitpost Don't want to specify which one, but I'm super excited to finally be working at a top tier McFAANG company! I will be in a Forward Deployed Food Engineering Specialist role! Some of my job responsibilities include: Building ETL pipelines to extract frozen patties from the FREEZER database and transforming them into ready made burgers Deriving insights and analysis on client orders from the cash register Managing real-time NoSQL (No Salt Queue Layer) deployments for french fry processing Maintaining high-throughput IO operations at drive-through queuing interface while ensuring sub-60-second response times Implementing mission-critical data cleaning protocols using proprietary mop-based algorithms Debugging ice cream machines I'm extremely excited to receive a base TC of over 280k (per decade) for my first job out of college! If anyone wants some tips or tricks, feel free to ask

When faced with a choice between proper debugging tools and littering your code with print statements, the red button wins every time. It's like choosing between a surgical scalpel and a sledgehammer for brain surgery, yet somehow we all default to the sledgehammer. The dopamine hit from seeing console.log("made it here") is just too powerful to resist. Sure, debuggers exist, but why use sophisticated tools when you can turn your terminal into an unreadable wall of text?

Content Debugging a horror game

THE AUDACITY! You thought you were being SO clever sharing your localhost link with some random internet person—because OBVIOUSLY they can totally access your computer through the magical internet fairies, right?! But then... PLOT TWIST! This networking genius somehow manages to find bugs in your backend code that YOU couldn't even see! The sheer BETRAYAL of sweating bullets because you just wanted to flex your half-baked website, and instead got exposed as the code disaster you truly are. Nothing says "I've made a terrible mistake" quite like realizing someone actually understood your localhost joke AND had the skills to humiliate you with it. Your face is now officially melting from the shame!

That moment when your IDE finds more errors than you have lines of code. The cat's judgmental stare perfectly captures the emotional damage of seeing your code dissected into a murder scene. It's like your IDE decided to count each missing semicolon as 5 separate errors just to flex on you. And somehow that one typo in your variable name triggered 47 cascading failures across files you didn't even know existed. Modern IDEs don't just find bugs—they psychologically profile your entire coding technique and find it wanting.