The Chaddest Dev To Rule Them All

The perfect visualization of scope creep in web development! What starts as a cute little kid wanting a few technologies (MongoDB, Redis, Angular) turns into a database apocalypse. First frame: "I only need 5 requests per minute!" Second frame: "Just a few tables with hundreds of records!" By the final frame, this innocent project has transformed into a resource-devouring monster with Oracle, Hadoop, and every framework under the sun strapped to it, terrorizing the server playground while screaming "MAKE WAY LOSERS! I'M ABOUT TO PROCESS MY 5 USERS!" The irony of overengineering a solution that serves practically no one is just *chef's kiss*. It's that side project that started with "I'll just use a simple stack" and somehow ended up with Kubernetes.

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Content mitchipedia Follow Nov 30. 2023 alecstapp o 20 ... Still laughing about the time a computer scientist who had his bike stolen tried to explain binary search to a cop Afterwards I found a chatroom thread among Cambridge computer scientists, one of whom had also been told that unless he could pin down the moment of theft no one would look at the footage. He said he had tried to explain sorting algorithms to police - he was a computer scientist, after all. You don't watch the whole thing, he said. You use a binary search. You fast forward to halfway, see if the bike is there and, if it is, zoom to three quarters of the way through. But if it wasn't there at the halfway mark, you rewind to a quarter of the way through. It's very quick. In fact, he had pointed out, if the CCTV footage stretched back to the dawn of humanity it would probably have only taken an hour to find the moment of theft. This argument didn't go down well. daebelly Follow Dec 26, 2023 i appreciate your valiant efforts but youre trying to explain sorting algorithms to a brick wall that hates you 62.1K notes D ProdrammerHumor.io

Ah, the modern tech job posting—where companies want a single developer with the skills of seventeen specialists working for the price of one junior. The guy nails it perfectly. When recruiters list every technology under the sun—from three programming languages to multiple frameworks, databases, cloud services, DevOps tools, and system administration—they're basically asking for a unicorn who can replace their entire engineering team. After 15 years in the industry, I've seen job descriptions evolve from "Java developer" to "technical demigod who can single-handedly build, deploy, and maintain the entire digital infrastructure of a Fortune 500 company while also making coffee." And the best part? They'll still call it "entry-level" and offer you exposure instead of a proper salary.

Watching security teams cheer on script kiddies is the tech equivalent of playing with your food. These devs set up a fake database honeypot and are gleefully watching some poor soul try every SQL injection trick in the book. The would-be hacker is throwing everything at it - from basic quotes to that classic DROP DATABASE command - while the team's practically popping popcorn watching the logs. It's like setting up an elaborate mouse trap and then rooting for the mouse. "Almost got the DB name!" Yeah, and I'm almost a millionaire every payday.

Content B https:za.indeed.commvie Full Job Description Software Developer Degree in computer science Minimum 10 years experience Not an AA position Self starter Good communication skills Problem solver Innovator Must be able to perform under pressure Attention to detail String Design Skills Mentoring skills Must have knowledge in: Databases (MySQL, Mongo and noSQL) Languages: PHP lava Python Android IOS Flutter Software tools Visual Stusio Code Netbeans Front-end Languages Bootstrap CSs HTML Javascript Frameworks OpencV Responsibilities Developing front end website architecture. Designing user interactions on web pages. Developing back end website applications. Creating and databases. Ensuring cross-platform optimization for mobile ProgrammerHumor. io