This Can't Be Coincidence

Content Thabiso magwaza 3rd Software Engineer at Discovery Limited 1W Software job postings be like: - Bs Computer science degree, master in machine learning and Al - Competent in C, C, Go, Javascript, Assembly, Linux and SQL - Competent with Docker, Kubernetes, AWS, Azure - Competent in Web Design, back-end design, database design, big data - Must have been to the moon at least once, fought in WW2 and can ride a parashoot - A pilot's licence would be an advantage 6, 9 757 Comments Like E Comment ( Share

The perfect excuse has arrived! When GitHub Actions is down, productivity grinds to a halt faster than a recursive function without a base case. There's something beautifully legitimate about telling your manager "Sorry, can't deploy that critical fix - GitHub's down" while secretly enjoying your unexpected coffee break. The best part? Even the most demanding managers instantly transform from "GET BACK TO WORK" to "Oh, carry on" because they know arguing with cloud infrastructure outages is like trying to debug by adding more bugs. Sweet, sweet dependency-induced freedom.

Causing mass cardiac events in the developer community with a single email. Pure evil. The beauty is in the timing - 11PM Friday when everyone's either drunk or asleep, ensuring maximum panic when they finally see it Saturday morning with a hangover. The $30,000 figure is just specific enough to be believable. Somewhere, an AWS engineer just felt a disturbance in the force.

Tech companies promising "democratized AI for everyone" until you ask about pricing is the tech industry's oldest bait and switch. Sure, they're "being honest" about making AI available—just conveniently forgetting to mention it'll cost you the equivalent of a car payment. And that awkward moment when the customer actually thanks them for the privilege of being financially drained? Pure Stockholm syndrome that every product manager dreams of.

Oh look, another tech bro who thinks his AI startup is a special snowflake in an avalanche! The meme perfectly captures the delusion of every "visionary founder" who believes their AI solution will "disrupt the entire industry" while the actual industry is just a massive warehouse of identical Buzz Lightyear toys. Spoiler alert: your revolutionary algorithm is probably just another if-else statement wearing a neural network costume. The tech world doesn't need another "groundbreaking" AI startup that predicts which cat videos you'll watch next—it needs founders who understand that saying "we use AI" is about as unique as having a LinkedIn profile. Next time you want to disrupt something, try disrupting your own ego first!

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