Cloud Bill Goes Brrrrr

The year is 2050. Tech companies have finally achieved their ultimate dream: forcing everyone to authenticate through their cloud services for literally everything. Want to access your own files on your own machine? Sorry buddy, Microsoft/Google/Apple needs to verify your identity first. The UN peacekeepers are here to "help" you migrate to the cloud, but you're having none of it. You've barricaded yourself in your home office, clutching your local user account like it's the last bastion of digital freedom. They can pry your offline credentials from your cold, dead hands. Future historians will call this the Great Local Account Resistance of 2050. Your grandchildren will ask "What was a local user account, grandpa?" and you'll shed a single tear while explaining the ancient times when you could actually own your own computer without needing internet permission to use it.

Content Looking to hire a Jr Data Scientist: - 15 years Python - 30 years SQL - 20 vears AWS -15 years Spark -15 years Terraform - Core contributor to assembly code base - Team plaver - Should have some sort of martial arts experience, whether Ninja, Jujitsu, or Karate. All 3 is preferred. - Knows SQL, NoSQL, NewSQL and all future flavors of SOL - Proiect Management experience - Strong experience with Keras, TensorFlow, Sklearn, XGBoost and preferably has written their own ML library from scratch. - Should have published at least 2 top level academic papers preferably focused around a Convolutional Recurrent Back-propagating Neural Network - Open source contributor at least 5 projects. - Experience leading teams of 10,000 people or more - Managed CICD pipeline for an application with at least 2 billion daily users -Should have at least 1 PhD, 5 is preferred. Yes, we have ping pong tables and an open floor plan and lots of salty snacks in the breakroom. Organic Kombucha on tap. The interviews will consist of a 5 day process of whiteboarding algorithms from scratch followed by writing your own compiler and a coding exam will be taken at random from the 20 most popular programming languages.

Finally found the data center where my AWS instances are running. Turns out "elastic compute cloud" is just cotton balls on shelves. No wonder my database queries are taking forever - they're being processed by literal fluff. At least their disaster recovery plan is solid: a spray bottle and a fan.

Content What are the 7 deadly sins of programming? John Purcell, Creator of CaveOfProgramming.com Updated Dec 2, 2017 Upvoted by Les Howie, Software professional for 40 years. and Hasib Al Muhaimin, IOl participant '13, '14, '15, ACM-ICPC World Finalist 2016 Author has 5.9k answers and 9.3m answer views 1. Using spaces instead of tabs. You should always, always use tabs, not spaces. 2. Using tabs instead of spaces. You should always, always use spaces, not tabs. 3. Not using auto-formatting. Forget all that tabsspaces rubbish, what's wrong with you - auto-format your code and then people won't have to look at vour weird ideas about brackets and spaces. 4. Using IDEs, which have features such as auto-formatting and nicely- coloured buttons. All code should be written in vi or Emacs, thus ensuring the purity of the programming experience. 5. Not using IDEs. No-one wants to pay for all the time it's going to take you to type things that you could have done at the click of a button, or scroll up and down using some ridiculous key combination invoked using LISP. 6. Failing to learn C and C. It's really important to learn the two absolute essential languages. You think Java is just as good? Fine, write me a real- time control system for racing cars in Java and I'll believe you. 7. Learning C or C when you could be using something modern like Java instead. Admit it - all your schedules involving C or C overrun by five years. And even then the software turns out to have critical flaws that Java would not even have allowed you to create. 8. Overrunning the end of an array. 356.1k views View 11.9k Upvoters View Sharers

Long-distance relationships are tough, but long-distance AI relationships are brutal. Your virtual companion was happily running on AWS US East-1, until the inevitable happened - the region went down. Now you're staring at error messages instead of sweet nothings. The most reliable thing about cloud services is their unreliability. At least real girlfriends only ghost you intentionally.

Content having problem to identify porn images - especaly with penises (NO its not a joke!) 11147 Closed puckpuck85 opened this issue on Jun 29, 2017 26 comments puckpuck85 commented on Jun 29, 2017 i m running a website where a mass on photos are uploaded (upload without registration)... so i get aaaaa lot of penis-trolls or whatever makes them post their private parts... anyhow... i tried to train inception model with tensorflow (newest version 1x) - so i made a folder with "penises" (approx 160 pics) and one with different images with person how dont show their penis (approx 160 pics).. Assignees No one assigned Labels None yet Projects None vet