Cloud Bill Goes Brrrrr

Content nadim nadimpatel Opens box of cereal We've updated our Privacy Policy 52218, 9:16 PM 31.2K Retweets 104K Likes

That cute open-source project with 10k GitHub stars? Just wait until BigTech acquires it and slaps a $49.99/month "enterprise" tier on features that used to be free. Remember when MongoDB changed their license because AWS was eating their lunch? Or when Docker suddenly needed to "monetize" after years of free containers? The corporate circle of life: embrace, extend, extinguish... and extract your credit card info. The only relationship these companies want is with your wallet.

Content Don't deploy to production on fridays This Dude Gets It, Folks

In a world where everything is becoming "as a Service" (SaaS, PaaS, IaaS), someone finally created the most useful service of all: rejection automation. This person's hoodie proudly declares their business model - saying "No" so you don't have to! For just $4.99/month, they'll decline all your meeting invites, reject pull requests with insufficient tests, and automatically respond "Have you checked Stack Overflow?" to all questions. The enterprise tier includes custom rejection templates and a "Maybe Later" option that recursively schedules itself to infinity. The irony? Their API documentation consists of a single endpoint that always returns 403 Forbidden.

THE ULTIMATE REVENGE PLOT! Behold the glorious moment of sweet, sweet vengeance as our unpaid intern commits the cardinal sin of tech - exposing the company's API key to the ENTIRE INTERNET! 💅 That's right, honey! After months of free labor and "experience," they're leaving a parting gift that'll have the senior devs SCREAMING at 2AM when the AWS bill hits astronomical levels. The digital equivalent of burning the building down on your way out. Petty? Perhaps. Justified? ABSOLUTELY. Now some random hacker can enjoy all those premium services the company was too cheap to pay their interns for!

Behold the mighty tower of "modern digital infrastructure" - a precarious stack of random components that somehow powers the entire internet. Meanwhile, AI is just a slingshot with some angry birds ready to topple the whole damn thing. Ten years of meticulously building cloud architecture, and some intern with a ChatGPT prompt is about to make it all irrelevant. The future of tech, brought to you by the same engineering principles as a game of Jenga.