A Full-Stack Developer

Content rAskReddit uS Eleni 12h After you die, you get access to a database with all the information ever known or collected throughout human history. What do you search for first? Discussion T 4.5k 2.0k Share BEST COMMENTS NicNoletree 11h 1 Award Find out what database software they use, how much data they have, and begin looking at the table structure and relationships. Reply 4 1.4k jeremy1015 6h Plot twist: It's Mongo and the entirety of human history is stored in a single JSON object. The top level is a key called "events" and the value is an unsorted array. 4 217 J JuniorSenior Trainee 3h Turns out god is a really nervous DB admin waiting for the inevitable. All the Apocalypse stuff in the Bible was actually just a misunderstanding of him saying "Guys you don't get it, I literally built this shit in seven days when I probably should've spent years on it. But management was pressuring me to deliver in seven days so I had to hack together this garbage and it will definitely break any minute now. 159 Ar4n 2h Mistranslation in the Bible. On the 7th day he tested.

Content PYTHON JAVA R MATLAB THATS RIGHT, THE PROJECT GOES INTO THE SQUARE HOLE

Content judge: i sentence you to the maximum punishment... Me: (whispering) please be death, please be death. judge: learn java Me: fuck

Companies love to brag about "sparing no expense" on their tech infrastructure, then proceed to hire exactly one developer to babysit 2 million lines of undocumented legacy code. Because why hire a team when you can just slowly crush the soul of a single engineer? The Jurassic Park reference is chef's kiss here—Newman's setup perfectly captures that "I'm surrounded by chaos I didn't create but am somehow responsible for" energy. At least Newman had dinosaurs as an excuse. Your solo dev just has management's budget cuts and unrealistic expectations.

Content Abhishek V...hney 3rd Senior Software Engineer... Follow 9h Edited I am proud to announce that, my kid at the age of 9 years, yes only 9 years, does not - care about getting into IT - know how to code in Python - know how to make Android app - know how to hack any websiteapp or whatever My kid - plays hide and seek and other games with friends - comes home daily with dirty clothes - can dance, learn swimming So it seems I am blessed with a normal kid, not a software engineer. letkidbekid letkidenjoychildhood childhoodneverreturn C0 4,136 ProdrammerHumor io 120 comments 17 shares

Content LEARNING ASSEMBLY WON'T BE USEFUL FOR YOUR CAREER. FOCUS ON C ME That sign won't stop me, because I can't read! ungflip.com