Winning With The Dumbest Algorithm Possible

Oh. My. GOD. The eternal struggle of every data scientist who's ever been handed a Word document and told to "just extract the data" from it! 💀 The bell curve of intelligence is BRUTALLY accurate here. The average schmucks (34% on each side) are blissfully declaring "Word files can't be read by a machine" while the absolute geniuses at both extremes (0.1%!) know the dark arts of table parsing. Meanwhile, every data engineer is in the corner having a nervous breakdown because Karen from marketing just sent over CRITICAL BUSINESS DATA as a beautifully formatted Word table with merged cells. THE HORROR!

The tech industry's relationship with the word "open" is like that ex who said they wanted an "open relationship" but actually meant "I want to see other people while you stay committed." On the left, we've got "Open" VPNs with fine print that would make a lawyer blush: "free" (after you pay), "unlimited" (for exactly two people), and source code you can view from such a distance you'll need the James Webb telescope. And then there's "Open" AI on the right—about as open as Fort Knox during a security drill. "Open research" (coming never), "open models" (just trust us, bro), and an "open culture" where sharing is strictly forbidden. After 15 years in tech, I've learned that "open" is corporate-speak for "we'll keep it open until we've captured enough market share to slam the door shut." Classic bait-and-switch, now with 100% more paywalls!

When GitHub Copilot generates your data class and decides to nest variables like Russian dolls. That's not a class, it's a family tree of Strings going back 17 generations. Somewhere in that code is the String that contains the meaning of life, but you'll need to scroll for 3 days to find it. Enterprise software at its finest—where simplicity goes to die.

The eternal battle between AI evangelists and Unix veterans continues. One side thinks neural networks are magical solutions to everything, while the other knows that most problems can be solved by turning it off and on again. The real intelligence was the force-quit shortcuts we learned along the way.

Oh. My. GOD. This is the MOST ACCURATE representation of modern development I've ever seen! 😭 Left side: A single, straight, BORING railway track representing the traditional coding path. Five HOURS of mind-numbing typing, debugging, and questioning your life choices just to build ONE. SIMPLE. APP. Right side: The CHAOTIC MASTERPIECE that is AI-assisted development! A thousand tracks going in every direction, signals flashing, complexity EVERYWHERE—but somehow delivering a working app in FIVE MINUTES! It's like comparing a tricycle to a nuclear-powered jetpack. Sure, both get you there, but one involves DRAMATICALLY more explosions and confused screaming! The future is here, and it's absolute MAYHEM!

Content Trump: Only 2 genders, Male, and Female