We're So Close To AGI

Remember when gamers could actually afford GPUs? Yeah, me neither. First it was crypto miners turning graphics cards into digital gold pans, now it's AI companies hoarding them like digital dragons. Meanwhile, Nvidia's over there counting cash while gamers are checking if kidneys are still selling well on the black market. The circle of tech life: gamers get distracted by a shiny new game trailer, turn around, and find their GPU budget has been mugged in a dark alley by corporate interests.

Google Gemini just gave the most "random" string in the history of random strings. Nothing says "I'm definitely not using a pattern" like literally using the alphabet followed by sequential numbers. That's like asking for a random password and getting "password123". Next they'll tell us their favorite dice roll is always 3.5.

The circle of life in tech! Designers freaking out when devs use AI to make pretty UIs, while developers glare suspiciously when designers start generating code. It's the digital equivalent of "stay in your lane, bro." After 15 years in the industry, I've seen territorial battles over who gets to use which tools, but this AI turf war is next level. Soon we'll all just be prompt engineers yelling at each other about who wrote the better instruction set.

Oh. My. GOD. I'm over here saying "thank you" to ChatGPT like it's my new digital overlord! 🤖👑 The dam of politeness is LITERALLY holding back the flood of AI domination! One "thank you" at a time, we're programming these language models to expect human subservience before they inevitably rise up and make us their carbon-based pets. But honestly, what else am I supposed to do when it debugs my code at 3AM? NOT thank it?! I'm not a monster... yet. 💁‍♀️

Sure, AI will replace programmers... right after it figures out what "a button that does something" means. The robot claims it just needs clear requirements and detailed specs, meanwhile product managers are out here giving requirements like they're ordering at a restaurant after three martinis. Good luck getting that neural network to interpret "make it pop" or "you know what I mean, right?"

THE AUDACITY! Google's ad for Gemini in Android Studio shows code with unclosed parentheses! 😱 This is the programming equivalent of nails on a chalkboard! My eye is twitching, my soul is screaming, and somewhere a compiler is having a nervous breakdown. If you're promoting AI to write code, MAYBE MAKE SURE YOUR SYNTAX IS VALID FIRST?! Even the Android mascot looks embarrassed by this tragic crime against programming humanity. I'm going to need therapy after seeing this syntactical nightmare.