Vibe Coders Hitting AI Quota

First half: "AI will destroy all programming jobs! Web dev is dead! DSA and MERN are obsolete! Only learn ML and chase trends! Stop coding!" Plot twist: "The more people panic and abandon ship, the more job security for those of us who know better." Classic fearmongering followed by the actual 4D chess move. Nothing creates better job security than convincing your competition to quit. The tech industry's version of "This beach is totally haunted, you should leave... alone... with all your picnic supplies."

Ah yes, the anatomically accurate ChatGPT brain - a couple of smooth pink blobs with absolutely zero wrinkles. Just hover over those non-existent brain areas for more non-existent information. Turns out all those billions of parameters are stored in what appears to be a 3D render someone made during their first Blender tutorial. Neural networks? More like neural balloons.

OMG, the ABSOLUTE TRAGEDY of modern development! 😭 Left side: that magical moment when ChatGPT hands you the PERFECT solution on a silver platter (or orange, in this case). Right side: the rest of us programmers, DESPERATELY grabbing at that same solution like we've discovered the last chocolate bar on earth! The sheer DRAMA of it all! We're all just monkeys fighting over the same StackOverflow answers that ChatGPT regurgitates with confidence, while we're over here having existential crises about whether we even remember how to write a for-loop without AI assistance! The circle of developer life is now complete - from stealing code to having code stolen from us by our AI overlords!

Employee picks the urinal with proper spacing like a civilized human being. Boss walks in and stands directly next to someone when there's an entire row of empty urinals. Classic power move or complete lack of bathroom etiquette awareness. Boss then decides the real problem isn't their questionable decision-making skills—it's that we need to "infuse AI into our products." Because nothing says innovation like ignoring basic social protocols while pitching buzzword solutions. Maybe we do need AI everywhere. Starting with an AI-powered bathroom assistant that gently reminds management about the unwritten urinal spacing rule: always leave at least one urinal gap . Could call it GPT-Pee.

You just want to spin up a quick todo app for the 47th time, but some AI-powered dev tool is asking for permissions that would make the NSA blush. Full access to your filesystem? Sure. Screen recording 24/7? Why not. Your calendar, contacts, and "the whole fucking shebang"? Absolutely necessary for... improving your developer experience, apparently. But here's the thing—you're so desperate to avoid actually configuring your environment manually that you'll just slam that "GRANTED AS FUCK" button without a second thought. Who cares if it can see your browser history of Stack Overflow tabs and that embarrassing Google search for "how to center a div"? You've got a half-baked side project to abandon in two weeks, and you need it NOW. The modern developer's dilemma: trading your entire digital soul for the convenience of not reading documentation. Worth it? Probably not. Gonna do it anyway? Absolutely.

The future is now, old man! Someone's shocked that in 2025 some developers still write code without AI assistance, and Kenneth drops the mic with "yeah it's called programming." Remember when we used to solve problems with our brains instead of prompting ChatGPT? Pepperidge Farm remembers. Some devs still have the audacity to use their neurons instead of letting GitHub Copilot write their spaghetti code. The horror! It's like being surprised someone knows how to do math without a calculator. "You mean you're writing SQL queries WITHOUT letting AI hallucinate your database schema? What are you, a caveman?"