This MF Cannot Code Without AI

The expectation vs. reality of online programming courses hits harder than a production bug on Friday afternoon. Top panel: "What they promise" - a perfect object detection model identifying everything with impressive confidence scores. "Yes, after this course you'll build YOLO models that can detect a mosquito from space!" Bottom panel: "What you actually learn" - a basic linear regression with scattered data points that barely fit the line. "Congratulations, you can now predict housing prices with 60% accuracy and call yourself a 'data scientist' on LinkedIn!" The brutal truth is most courses promise you'll become the next AI genius, but you'll end up struggling to remember which way the x and y axes go. And somehow they'll still charge you $499 for the privilege.

ChatGPT has officially completed its transformation into a real software engineer by mastering the ultimate developer defense mechanism: "It works on my machine." The sacred incantation that has shielded programmers from responsibility since the dawn of computing has now been adopted by AI. Next up: blaming the user's configuration, suggesting a system reboot, and proposing we rewrite everything in Rust. The student has truly become the master.

The ultimate nightmare for data scientists just dropped! Imagine trying to pip install your favorite packages and getting hit with a "Trade War Exception: Additional 25% CPU usage required." NumPy gets special treatment with an extra 10% because apparently array operations are a national security threat. Next thing you know, we'll need to smuggle TensorFlow modules across the border in USB sticks labeled "definitely not machine learning." The irony of putting tariffs on Python imports when they're literally free and open source is just *chef's kiss* peak software geopolitics.

Remember when 8GB VRAM was god-tier? Now it's the bare minimum for running those bloated AI models and rendering engines. $400 for entry-level specs that would've been flagship material a decade ago is the new normal. The hardware inflation is so bad that we're genuinely excited about mediocrity. Next we'll be celebrating when our IDE opens in under a minute.

Ah yes, the classic "medicine bottle labeled as ChatGPT" with a terrified new programmer staring at it. Remember when we had to actually learn how to code? Now junior devs just ask ChatGPT "write me a React component that fetches data and handles errors" and boom—instant senior developer! Back in my day, we debugged with print statements and cried ourselves to sleep reading documentation. The future is here, and it's making all those hours I spent memorizing syntax feel like a complete waste of time.

The evolution of a developer's heart palpitations! While reading documentation keeps your cardiac rhythm steady, copying Stack Overflow code makes it flutter a bit. But blindly pasting AI-generated code? That's cardiac arrest territory. Nothing says "I've given up on understanding what I'm doing" quite like asking ChatGPT to solve your problems and implementing the solution without even a sanity check. The blurrier the heart, the closer you are to being promoted to "Stack Trace Interpreter Intern."