Promptsitutes: The New Bottom Of The Dev Food Chain

Ah, nothing says "top-notch security" like giving a 25-year-old access to government databases AND AI systems, then watching them accidentally paste an API key on GitHub. Because what could possibly go wrong when someone has access to both Social Security data and cutting-edge LLMs? This is peak "move fast and break things" energy, except the "things" are national security and AI safeguards. The sarcastic "should fill all Americans with a deep sense of confidence" is chef's kiss material. Future historians will call this the "control-C, control-V apocalypse."

Data scientists and animal traffickers finding common ground over import pandas . Because nothing says "legitimate data analysis" quite like importing an endangered species into your Python script. The pandas library is so ubiquitous in data science that it's practically the handshake of the entire field. Every Jupyter notebook starts the same way: import pandas as pd , and suddenly you're part of the club. And yes, if you're importing Polars (the newer, faster DataFrame library), you're technically trafficking polar bears now. The authorities have been notified.

Remember when we actually had to memorize algorithms and syntax? Now my brain's shrinking faster than my will to whiteboard during interviews. The top image shows Homer Simpson's brain scan before ChatGPT, all plump and functional. The bottom shows what's left after outsourcing our thinking to AI - just enough neurons to type "write me a function that..." and hit enter. Evolution in reverse, folks - soon we'll just be fingers attached to a coffee mug.

You spend days crafting a pull request, refactoring everything, writing tests, adding documentation, making it absolutely beautiful. Then some bot rolls up and says "Full of AI slop, completely unhelpful" and you just... lose it. The real gut punch? Half the time the bot is right. With AI code generators flooding repos with generic solutions and copy-paste answers, human-written code is starting to look suspiciously similar to GPT's homework. We've reached the point where genuine effort gets flagged as synthetic garbage while actual AI slop sneaks through because it happened to use the right buzzwords. The Turing test has officially reversed: now we have to prove we're NOT robots.

Google really said "let's revolutionize coding with AI!" and then proceeded to create the most EXHAUSTING onboarding experience known to humankind. You're hyped, you download it, and suddenly you're trapped in authentication hell—three login attempts like you're trying to break into Fort Knox. Then BAM, rate limited after 5 prompts because apparently Google thinks you're trying to speedrun the singularity. And the cherry on top? Rumors swirling that Google's own engineers aren't even allowed to use their own creation. The absolute BETRAYAL. So naturally, you crawl back to VS Code with your tail between your legs, defeated by corporate bureaucracy once again. Sometimes the old reliable just hits different.