Please Stop Adding AI To Everything

Ah yes, the future of Windows: where your AI assistant doesn't just suggest things—it actively hijacks your workflow to serve you ads, invest your money in meme stocks, and disable your keyboard "for your convenience." The pop-up demanding you wait 2 minutes to interact with Copilot unless you pay $100/month is chef's kiss. And naturally, Copilot has already taken the liberty of investing all your money in MSFT because it knows what's best for you. Meanwhile, you're getting helpful tips about how you don't need a mouse anymore—just hold the Copilot key and speak! Because nothing says "productivity" like dictating requests to an AI that's already disabled your peripherals. The screen control request at the bottom is just the cherry on top. Windows 12: where the OS doesn't work for you, you work for the OS.

OH. MY. GOD. Someone actually asked ChatGPT to code the gender pay gap into existence! 😱 The absolute AUDACITY to create a function that multiplies a man's salary by 0.77 to get a woman's salary! This is like asking an AI to mathematically formalize inequality while wearing a suit and pretending it's just "realistic programming." The function is so brutally honest it might as well have variable names like "systematic_inequality" and "patriarchy_coefficient." Whoever prompted this probably also asks for functions to calculate how many kitchen appliances equal one sports car. 💀

AI companies pitching their next model like "just give us another 500 megawatts and we'll totally achieve AGI this time, we promise." The exponential scaling of AI training infrastructure has gotten so ridiculous that tech giants are literally partnering with nuclear power plants to feed their GPU farms. Microsoft's Three Mile Island deal, anyone? The tweet format is chef's kiss—the baby doubling in size with exponential growth that makes zero biological sense perfectly mirrors how AI companies keep scaling compute and expecting intelligence to magically emerge. "Just 10x the parameters again, bro. Trust me, bro. AGI is right around the corner." Meanwhile, the energy consumption is growing faster than the actual capabilities. Fun fact: Training GPT-3 consumed about 1,287 MWh of electricity—enough to power an average American home for 120 years. And that was the small one compared to what they're cooking up now.

The AUDACITY of AI to commit such architectural VIOLENCE! 😱 Claude 4 swoops in like some code-refactoring superhero, absolutely DECIMATING this poor developer's codebase with a single call. 3,000+ new lines?! TWELVE new files?! The AI practically performed MAJOR SURGERY on this monolithic spaghetti code! And then the PLOT TWIST that has me SCREAMING: "None of it worked." But the chef's kiss? The absolute DRAMA? "But boy was it beautiful." I'm literally DYING at this peak programmer aesthetic - valuing beautiful, non-functional code over the ugly mess that actually runs. It's the coding equivalent of buying a gorgeous sports car that immediately breaks down in your driveway! 💀

Finally, a sorting algorithm with the computational complexity of O($$). Just send your array to GPT, pay a few cents, and get it back sorted. Perfect for when you need your data arranged but can't be bothered to remember how quicksort works. The best part? If your array isn't sorted correctly, you can just claim it's because the AI "didn't understand the vibe" of your integers.

Remember when you thought COVID lockdowns were bad for hardware prices? Sweet summer child. First the pandemic turned GPU shopping into a battle royale where scalpers ruled supreme and mining rigs ate everything in sight. RAM prices went bonkers, and suddenly your "budget build" cost more than a used car. Then just when supply chains started recovering and you could finally afford that upgrade, the AI boom showed up like a final boss with unlimited HP. Now every tech giant is hoarding GPUs like they're infinity stones, and Nvidia can't print H100s fast enough. Your dream of a reasonably priced RTX 4090? Cute. Those are going to data centers now, buddy. The real tragedy? We survived the crypto mining apocalypse, clawed through the pandemic shortage, only to get absolutely demolished by ChatGPT's older siblings demanding entire warehouses of compute. At this rate, you'll need a mortgage to build a gaming PC by 2025.