Please Stop Adding AI To Everything

The cosmic horror of GPU shopping in 2024! Our hero tries to negotiate for a graphics card, but the seller (standing in for Galactus, devourer of worlds... and wallets) has demands that strike fear into the hearts of budget-conscious developers everywhere: 12GB Budget GPUs. The punchline hits harder than a memory leak in production—there's nothing "budget" about these cards anymore! What used to cost a reasonable sum now requires sacrificing your firstborn and possibly a kidney. The shocked faces in the audience perfectly capture every developer trying to build a decent machine for ML training without selling vital organs.

Ah, the ultimate job security plan! Turns out the one person AI won't replace is the colleague who contributes absolutely nothing. That sweet spot where you're so useless that even automation can't justify the ROI of replacing you. It's like finding a bug so bizarre that QA just labels it as "expected behavior" and moves on. The perfect defense against technological unemployment isn't upskilling—it's strategic incompetence!

Content WE TRAINED COPILOT ON YOUR CODE THAT'S WHY IT SUCKS

The duality of AI in the development lifecycle is painfully accurate. Junior devs are celebrating like they've discovered fire – "Look ma, no hands!" – while generating code they barely understand. Meanwhile, senior developers stare into the existential void as they're forced to review the AI-generated spaghetti mess. That thousand-yard stare says it all: "I've seen things... terrible things... like nested ternaries and 200-line functions named 'doStuff'." The circle of programming life continues – AI just made the mess arrive faster.

Sometimes the dumbest solution is the winning solution! This freshman created a poker bot with just two lines of code: if isMyTurn: goAllIn() and absolutely demolished sophisticated algorithms by exploiting their risk-averse logic. The sophisticated bots kept folding to aggressive all-ins, proving that in both poker and programming, simplicity can trump complexity. It's basically the computational equivalent of the "spray and pray" technique—except it actually worked!

So that's how GPT-5 reasoning works! Just wait 30 milliseconds, print "reasoning complete," and then call GPT-4. Revolutionary stuff. Turns out all those fancy AI companies are just adding a sleep timer and calling it "reasoning." Next they'll tell us AGI is just GPT-4 with a 60-second nap and a cup of virtual coffee. The best part? It's MIT licensed, so we can all pretend to have reasoning capabilities now! Just remember: the key to advanced AI isn't better algorithms—it's better acting .