An Actual Surprise

Nothing quite matches that moment of divine intervention when your frozen app suddenly springs back to life the second you threaten it with Task Manager. It's like the software equivalent of a kid pretending to be asleep when their parent walks in. The program's internal monologue: "Oh crap, they're bringing out the big guns—better start working again before I get force-closed into oblivion!" The threat of digital execution is surprisingly effective motivation for even the most stubborn applications.

Content How to fix any computer The Oatmeal http:theoatmeal.com Windows Step I. Reboot Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step 2 Step a. Format hard drive. Reinstall Windows. Lose all your files. Quietly weep. Apple Step I. Take it to an Apple store. Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step 2. Buy a new Mac. Overdraw your account. Quietly weep. Linux Step 1. Learn to code in Ct. Recompile the kernel. Build your own microprocessor out of spare silicon you had lying around. Recompile the kernel again. Switch distros. Recompile the kernel again but this time using a CPU powered by refracted light from Saturn. Grow a gant beard. Blame Sun Microsystems. Turn your bedroom into a server closet and spend ten years falling asleep to the sound of whirring fans. Switch distros again. Abandon all hygiene. Write a regular expression that would make other programmers cry blood. Learn to code in Java Recompile the kernel again (but this time while wearing your lucky socks) Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a n Step a. Revert back to using Windows or a Mac Quietly weep.

Content Gautam imComputerGeek Linux user:- Windows 10 is for idiots, smart people use linux distros. Linus trovalds is great. Also Linux user: My wift and graphic driver issue ate my entire week. more than 700mb ram usage. Hmm...something is wrong, lets compile entire kernel and install it "again"

Remember when spaces in filenames were basically forbidden by the laws of computing physics? Those of us who survived the DOS/early Windows era still twitch nervously at the thought. Nothing like typing cd My Documents only to have the terminal smugly respond with The system cannot find the path specified . Then you'd have to do that awkward cd "My Documents" or worse, cd My\ Documents like some command line contortionist. The trauma runs deep enough that even in 2025, we're still reaching for that underscore key like it's a security blanket. final_report_ACTUAL_v2_FINAL_REALLY_THIS_TIME.docx just feels safer somehow.

Someone tried to sing "If You're Happy And You Know It" in a command prompt and the computer responded the only way it knows how - with cold, unfeeling syntax errors. The computer doesn't care about your happiness. It only cares about correct syntax. This is basically every developer's relationship with their compiler in a nutshell. No clapping hands, just error messages.

Content rawn rrawnyy 8h met two of my friends from high school, both started cs in college one uses arch, neovim, and takes all of his class notes in latex unemployed the other uses github desktop on windows and can only code in java multiple job offers what does this mean chat 185 17 171 4.2K Ta 189K yuria nachoyawn Follow it is easier for grifters to get a job because most people who are technically better are worse at social situations and thus do not get past as many interviews