Y'all Are Web Devs Right?

Two wizards plotting the downfall of developer sanity! Nothing says "I wield ultimate power" like enforcing tabs over spaces or requiring semicolons after every statement. These lint lords stand atop their mountain, gazing upon the kingdom of code they're about to throw into chaos with their arcane proclamations. The dark wizard is definitely pushing for "no-unused-vars" while his companion is advocating for "max-line-length: 80". Together they're crafting the perfect ESLint config that will make the entire engineering team contemplate career changes. Pure evil has never been so perfectly indented.

SWEET MERCIFUL CODE GODS! Someone actually wrote a bot that posts the EXACT SAME recycled jokes we see daily on r/ProgrammerHumor! 😱 This masterpiece of automation randomly selects from the greatest hits collection: "Linux > Windows," "JavaScript sucks," and my personal favorite "how to exit vim" (a question that has trapped developers in terminal purgatory since the dawn of time). The tragic part? This bot would ABSOLUTELY farm more karma than my actual coding projects. Why spend weeks building something useful when you can just scream "SEMICOLON MISSING" and watch the upvotes roll in? Programming culture is officially eating itself!

The secret to web developer wealth revealed: sending a "Request" and getting paid for a "Reponse" (yes, with that magnificent typo). This is basically the world's simplest business model - ask server for money, server gives money back. If only it were that easy! The real irony is that most webdev boyfriends are actually sending thousands of requests just to get a response that says "404: Money Not Found." The relationship between client and server is the only stable relationship in their lives.

Behold the library scholar who created a single "Hello World" repository and suddenly transforms into an open source evangelist. Nothing screams "expert contributor" quite like pushing six lines of code that literally every programming tutorial starts with. It's the equivalent of making one grilled cheese sandwich and calling yourself a Michelin-star chef. The audacity is almost admirable - standing there with SpongeBob, preaching the gospel of collaboration while their entire coding portfolio consists of console.log("Hello World!") . The open source community trembles in anticipation of such revolutionary contributions.

The existential crisis of modern programming in one tweet! Someone asks if you're a bot, and the reply cuts straight to the bone: "We are all bots. Some implemented with neurons and synapses, others with PHP. Arguably both are about the same IQ." Brutal takedown of PHP developers everywhere while simultaneously questioning what even makes us human. The philosophical burn is so savage it makes Descartes' "I think therefore I am" look like a casual observation. PHP catching strays in a conversation about artificial intelligence is peak programmer humor.

Ah, the classic Teletubbies invasion of your codebase! The meme brilliantly shows how synchronous functions (a through e) work together in harmony, holding hands in a neat little circle. But then that one async function shows up and BOOM – suddenly your clean execution flow is replaced by an army of purple creatures taking over everything. This is basically what happens when you introduce that first async function into your previously synchronous paradise. One minute you're writing nice, predictable code where everything happens in order. The next minute you're dealing with promises, callbacks, race conditions, and wondering why your console is printing results in what seems like a completely random order. And just like Teletubbies, once async enters your codebase, it multiplies uncontrollably until your entire project is saying "Eh-oh" to debugging sanity.