Y'all Are Web Devs Right?

JavaScript developers evolving their Promise syntax like it's Pokémon. First there was .convertToPromise() which nobody remembers using. Then came .makePromise() , the awkward teenage phase. But .promisify() ? That's the good stuff that makes developers bare their teeth in that special "I finally found the right utility function after 3 hours of Stack Overflow" grin.

The eternal Edge vs. Chrome battle strikes again! Microsoft Edge is portrayed as a desperate entity trapped for millennia, only to be accidentally summoned by your misclick. That split second when you hit the wrong icon and Edge bursts forth like an ancient being finally escaping its prison—complete with maniacal laughter and excessive enthusiasm. What makes this extra painful is that Edge is actually decent now (it's Chromium-based!), but developers still treat it like that weird cousin nobody wants to talk to at family gatherings. The desperate "I'M FREE!" energy perfectly captures how Edge feels when it finally gets a chance to convince you it's not Internet Explorer in disguise.

The classic developer bait-and-switch. You're knee-deep in Stack Overflow at 2AM, desperately trying to fix that one bug that's been haunting you for days. Finally, you find what looks like salvation—a blog post that addresses your exact problem! Your heart races... until you scroll down and see that suspiciously professional CTA button. Suddenly you realize this "helpful guide" is just elaborate marketing for some enterprise SaaS product with a pricing model that starts at "contact sales" and ends with your company's entire Q3 budget. The worst part? You're still tempted to try it because you're that desperate.

Programmer 1: *writes simple ternary operator to check if a number is odd or even* Random person: "gator hugger" Programmer 2: "That's JS's ternary operator, python works differently." Programmer 1: *creates unholy abomination that calls JavaScript from Python just to use a ternary operator* This is the equivalent of driving to another country because you prefer their traffic lights. Modern programming is just finding increasingly complex ways to avoid learning syntax differences.

The medieval monstrosity perfectly captures what it feels like to be a full-stack developer. You're simultaneously playing a beautiful frontend melody while your backend is a bizarre creature with a face for a butt that's tooting out server responses. One minute you're crafting pixel-perfect CSS, the next you're debugging why your database queries are producing hot garbage. No wonder full-stack devs wear funny hats—it's the only way to maintain sanity while straddling two completely different worlds!

Oh. My. GOD! Someone's actually using the 400 status code instead of just slapping 500 on everything like a lazy barbarian! 💅 The sheer AUDACITY of this developer to actually use proper HTTP status codes! It's like watching a unicorn do calculus—RARE and BEAUTIFUL. The rest of us are over here throwing Internal Server Errors at our users like confetti while this absolute LEGEND is categorizing client errors with surgical precision. I'm not crying, YOU'RE crying! This level of API etiquette should be framed and hung in the Louvre!