Someone Delved Too Greedily And Too Deep

Content Boss says to build a web app in IS and React Boss: "Why isn't this in Nextis? This should use Nextis.' I spend 10 hours refactoring rewriting Boss: "Why isn't this in TypeScript? This should use TS." ProarammerHumor.io spend 20 hours on the first set of reas Boss: "Why isn't this in Nextis? This should use Nextis." I spend 40 hours on the next set of reas Boss: "Why isn't this in TypeScript? This should use TS."

Content STOP DOING TYPESCRIPT TYPE CHECKING WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE TURING COMPLETE YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for data types other than STRING and NUMBER Want to check if your code will work? We have a tool for that: It is called "RUNNING IT" Types DON'T EXIST, it's all deleted by the transpiler "Yes, please abort my build because a type isn't correctly labeled as bivariant. Please paint my screen red because I didn't install typesreact" - Statements dreamed up by the utterly Deranged LOOK at what Programmers have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all the computers and frameworks we built for them (These are REAL types, made by REAL Programmers) nectedConponent React .ComponentclassPickconitc(OnitcOnitedefs.OnitefulParans. keyof ErrorHandli aMierationsA. B. MierateB. CI aMierations?A. B, C, MigrateC, D; Mierations3A. B. C. D. MigrateD. E1: MigrateEa Marat 0. InfersbleConne MigrationstAA Migrations15A Testonde kovof LocalStoraecivockso. A mapDispatch only (as a function) tro state a M. Thisnatchoronsi no state - (. TDispatchProos - 1. TOenProo as manState and mardisnatch (as a function): StateProps (1), TDispatchProos (), TOmProp as manState and aschicostch las a TDi spat chProos no state - 0. StateProps (). no dispatch (. TOmProo no state 1. TDispatchoron They have played us for absolute fools

The political compass, but make it nerdy . This chart perfectly maps the tech world's tribal warfare onto a Freedom-Proprietary and Tradition-Disruption grid. In the top-left, we've got the "Libredev" quadrant where bearded Unix wizards and Emacs cultists fight for software freedom while clinging to technologies older than most junior devs. Think GNU/Linux (yes, you must call it that) and C++ codebases that haven't been refactored since 1997. Top-right "Cogdev" is where Microsoft and corporate tech lives - traditional, enterprise-y, and about as free as a subscription service. These are the folks who think Visual Studio is lightweight and unironically use the phrase "synergistic business solutions." Bottom-right "Soydev" quadrant is where you'll find Apple fanboys and JavaScript framework enthusiasts who will rebuild their entire tech stack every six months because some Medium article told them to. They're disrupting the industry by reinventing the wheel with more dependencies. And finally, bottom-left "Hypedev" - home of Rust evangelists and blockchain bros who won't stop talking about how their technology will save humanity. They're all about disruption and freedom, just don't mention that their revolutionary project is still in beta after 5 years.

When someone recommends their own library to you on Twitter and you just awkwardly say "thanks I'll check it out" knowing full well you'll never look at it. The TypeScript equivalent of nodding politely while backing away slowly. Classic developer social interaction in the wild.

Look at the date on that announcement: April 1, 2025. Someone clearly understands TypeScript so well they can time travel to make April Fool's jokes from the future. The "I understand how TS works and can parse dates" title is pure gold - because anyone who's spent more than 10 minutes with JavaScript date handling knows it's the programming equivalent of trying to solve a Rubik's cube underwater while wearing oven mitts. Next up: Vercel announces they're rewriting Next.js in COBOL for "performance reasons." I'll believe that one too if you catch me before my morning coffee.

This meme perfectly captures the duality of programming languages. On the left, we have the muscular Doge representing "Any other language" where you can cram an entire project into one line and the compiler just shrugs and says "whatever." Meanwhile, Python (the wimpy Doge) is having an existential crisis because you forgot a single space in your indentation. Python's strict whitespace requirements will have you staring at "IndentationError" for 30 minutes before realizing you mixed tabs and spaces like some kind of monster. The compiler that was supposed to make your life easier is now questioning your entire existence because you dared to press the spacebar incorrectly. It's basically like having a grammar nazi as your interpreter.