The Perfect Crime: No Comments

Ah yes, the mythical "real programmer" – that elusive creature who apparently codes everything from scratch using nothing but pure brain power and cosmic vibes. Meanwhile, in reality, the rest of us mortals are over here frantically Googling syntax, copying from Stack Overflow, and begging AI to fix our broken code at 3 AM. The gatekeeping is strong with this one! Next thing you'll tell me "real programmers" only code on punchcards while standing barefoot in the snow, uphill both ways.

The corporate ladder climb speedrun any%. Dude took a perfectly functional Java service that ran flawlessly for 5 years and nuked it with an unnecessary microservices rewrite in Go—just to pad the resume with "scope" and "complexity" for that sweet L5 to L6 promotion at Amazon. The result? A system that's slower, costs 2x more, and has memory leaks that wake people up at 2 AM. But hey, the 20-page design doc was strategic enough to fool management. The real galaxy brain move though? Getting promoted, then immediately transferring to a "chill Core Infra team" before the whole thing implodes. Now some poor new grad inherits a ticking time bomb for $550k TC while our protagonist is sipping coffee, off-call, watching the chaos unfold from a safe distance. Truly a masterclass in corporate self-preservation and passing the buck. Fun fact: This is basically the tech industry version of "I'm not stuck in here with you, you're stuck in here with me"—except the villain escapes before the final act.

Content OPS DUE BY Kelly Kochanski, Phillip Remaker and Alec Cawley upvoted 2h X Carey Aydelotte Follow humanish Sun Will software engineers ever stop being in demand? There are two schools of thought. Those with a background in business see developers as commodities and fully believe that programmers will program themselves out of a job field. The idea is that in some distant future, jobs like project manager, product manager, and marketing manager will still be critical but programmers themselves will be extinct as a result of the tools they created. The other school of thought is hard to understand because the programmers are laughing so hard they can't talk. 13.4K views View 964 upvotes View 4 shares WERE S You, Phillip Remaker, Michael Jorgensen and 7 more upvoted this 1 964 I G4 D 34 2 000

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Content 10:57 TeliaDK N ACE All 77 Tweet Unristne unen a liked Kelly Vaughn kvlly Casual reminder that program- ming on a plane increases your badass level by 14 9:57 PM 20 Sep 19 Twitter for Android 7 Retweets 217 Likes 9 17 moke (I D mokedev - 57m V Replying to kvlly You don't even have to deploy because it's already on the cloud BUDAN ISSS GIF 36 Tweet vour replv