Saving the code that matters

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The battle cry of developers who've been through one too many sprint retrospectives where they somehow finished 70 points but now have 100 points remaining. Nothing says "efficiency" like spending 90% of your time in planning meetings about how to reduce meetings. Or using poker cards to estimate work because apparently, software complexity scales exactly like a Texas Hold'em hand. My favorite part is how we pretend story points aren't time measurements while simultaneously tracking velocity. Math is hard when you're busy "grooming" the backlog—a term that should absolutely get you on a watchlist. That pie chart showing 95% planning and 5% work is the most accurate documentation ever produced in an agile environment.

Ah, feature creep—the silent killer of elegant architecture. What started as a beautiful, simple interchange suddenly turns into the LA freeway system from hell because some product manager said "wouldn't it be cool if we added just one more thing?" The best part? That "one more thing" breaks twelve other things you didn't even know were connected. Welcome to maintenance hell, population: you.

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