It Be Like This

The desperate plea of every developer trying to get a straight answer from an AI. That moment when you've spent 3 hours crafting the perfect prompt, only to receive a hallucinated API response that would make a JSON validator commit seppuku. The modern equivalent of "I'll do your homework if you just show me how to solve this one problem." Except now your mortgage payment depends on getting valid data without a single curly brace out of place.

Content 'S')U','n','s'",'h',l,'n',;'e' ARRAY OFSUNSHINE

The eternal struggle of every IT professional at electronics stores. That moment when the Best Buy employee innocently asks "Do you need help?" and your brain immediately switches to superiority mode. You've spent the last decade debugging kernel panics and configuring RAID arrays—of course you know the difference between HDMI 2.0 and 2.1! You didn't spend four years getting a CS degree to be asked if you've tried turning it off and on again. The internal monologue is deafening: "I could probably fix their POS system faster than they could sell me this overpriced HDMI cable." Yet we still go there... every... single... time.

Ah yes, the classic "assign string values to boolean variables and then use them in boolean expressions" approach. Nothing like setting true = "false" and false = "true" to ensure your future self has a mental breakdown during debugging. The condition if(true/false==false/true) is just *chef's kiss* - comparing divisions of strings masquerading as booleans. And that true = false + false line? String concatenation disguised as addition in a boolean context. Whoever wrote this probably also enjoys putting pineapple on pizza and using spaces instead of tabs.

The generational coding war in three frames. Junior dev with a broomstick getting roasted for using "ordinary functions and objects" and basic HTTP requests by some floating coding wizard. Then the mic drop: "My mentor said it was enough for projects of this era." Every senior dev has been that floating wizard, criticizing someone for not using the latest framework-du-jour or some unnecessarily complex architecture. Meanwhile, the junior with their simple CRUD app is actually shipping while we're busy bikeshedding about whether to use GraphQL or gRPC for a to-do list.

Content Mark Dalgleish markdalgleish Developers during hackathon: We built an entire application in just 3 days. Developers after hackathon: Adding that icon is going to take 3 weeks.