If It Works, It Works

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Content Randall Koutnik rkoutnik Follow V Why programmers like cooking: You peel the carrot, you chop the carrot, you put the carrot in the stew. You don't suddenly find out that your peeler is several versions behind and they dropped support for carrots in 4.3 9:22 PM - 16 Jan 2019 1,845 Retweets 5,689 Likes 68 17 1.8K 5.7K

Content THAT WAS SURPRISINGLY EASY. HOW COME THE ROBOTIC UPRISING USED SPEARS AND ROCKS INSTEAD OF MISSILES AND LASERS? IF YOU LOOK TO HISTORICAL DATA THE VAST MAJORITY OF BATTLE-WINNERS USED PRE-MODERN WEAPONRY. Thanks to machine-learning algorithms, the robot apocalypse was short-lived.

The existential horror of waking up to check if your massive download finished overnight, only to find it's been sitting there, politely waiting for your confirmation like some digital sociopath. That 30GB file—probably a game, development environment, or Linux distro—has been at 100% for hours, but refuses to complete without your explicit blessing. The look of pure, unadulterated panic is the universal response of someone who just realized they could have been using that software seven hours ago . Nothing quite matches the rage of discovering your computer has been holding your download hostage while you slept, requiring just one simple click that it absolutely couldn't make on its own. Technology: making simple tasks unnecessarily complicated since forever.

Content CHOP CHOP AARGH WHY IS THIS STRUCTURE HERE? WHERE COULD THIS BRIDGE POSSIBLY LEAD ? WHAT A HORRIBLY DESIGNED STREET, MOST INEFFICIENT. WHAT IS ALL THIS CRAP? THIS SIGN DOESN'T HELP ME MUCH. THiS IS BRIDGE GOOD GOD! WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS CONTRAPTION DO? I hate reading other people's code.

Content GENTLEMEN, IT IS WITH GREAT DISPLEASURE I WOULD LIKE TO INFORM YOU THAT I LOST THE HARD DRIVE WHERE ALL MY HOBBY PROJECTS FROM THE BEGINNING WERE STORED made with mematic