I Keep It In The GPT Chat

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Oh. My. GOD! The eternal programmer duality captured in one glorious doge meme! 💅 On Monday: "This framework is LITERALLY GARBAGE?! Fine! I'll build my own spectacular tool from scratch because I'm a coding GODDESS and nothing can stop my genius!" *dramatically rolls up sleeves* On Friday: "You know what? This feature isn't even that important. Who even NEEDS authentication? Not my problem anymore! *throws feature in trash* PROJECT SCOPE REDUCED, DARLING!" *collapses dramatically* The whiplash between "I can rebuild civilization with code" and "I surrender completely" happens approximately every 72 hours in a developer's life. It's called ✨balance✨

What looks like a chaotic mess of variables is actually a brilliant mathematical prank. When you run this JavaScript code, those seemingly random fractions spell out n*e*g*a*t*i*v*e + e*i*g*h*t + e*l*e*v*e*n , which evaluates to 3 for inputs -11 to 11. This is peak "write-only code" - perfectly functional but practically unmaintainable. The creator spent hours crafting these precise fractions so each variable represents exactly the right letter value in the mathematical expression. It's like hiding a math formula in plain sight while making your code reviewer contemplate a career change.

Behold the library scholar who created a single "Hello World" repository and suddenly transforms into an open source evangelist. Nothing screams "expert contributor" quite like pushing six lines of code that literally every programming tutorial starts with. It's the equivalent of making one grilled cheese sandwich and calling yourself a Michelin-star chef. The audacity is almost admirable - standing there with SpongeBob, preaching the gospel of collaboration while their entire coding portfolio consists of console.log("Hello World!") . The open source community trembles in anticipation of such revolutionary contributions.

When LinkedIn meets GitHub, truth bombs explode! This genius "Senior Data Engineer" created a script that automatically commits to GitHub every few minutes—making his contribution graph look like he's coding 24/7. Little did he know his "10-minute hack" would expose the entire tech hiring circus. The second part shows a recruiter drooling over this fake activity: "We offered him $500k without even interviewing!" Because apparently, a green GitHub grid is more impressive than actual skills. Who needs technical interviews when you can automate your way to looking productive? Remember kids, it's not about building useful things—it's about making sure your contribution graph looks like a radioactive lawn.

Content ME, 5 MINUTES BEFORE THE ARCHITECTURE MEETING ENDS: HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT SCALING