AI
AWS
Agile
Algorithms
Android
Apple
Backend
Bash
C++
Cloud
Csharp
Finally, a project status report that doesn't sugarcoat reality! This is what happens when your PM asks for "complete transparency" and you take it personally.
From the 23.64 GB codebase (because who needs optimization?) to the "mix of tabs and spaces" (the mark of a true chaotic evil), this is every tech lead's nightmare made manifest.
My favorite part? The test status: "Segmentation fault (core dumped)" paired with "passing if you try a second time" — which is basically every developer saying "it works on my machine" with extra steps.
And let's not ignore the "coffee drunk: 694 L" metric — the only truly accurate measurement in the entire report.
