Coding After An All Nighter

Content DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GTHUB. HOW IT WORKS, OR WHY I SHOULD USE IT AND AT THIS POINT IM T00 AFRAID TO ASK

The classic dad-meets-boyfriend scenario gets a programming twist. When asked what he uses "on the client," this smooth operator decides to flex with "I'm a vibe coder, and my clients don't code" – possibly the worst answer in the history of developer pickup lines. It's that special blend of buzzword nonsense and zero technical substance that makes every senior developer's soul leave their body. The only appropriate response? "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE." And honestly, fair enough. Anyone who unironically calls themselves a "vibe coder" deserves to be escorted off the premises immediately.

Every dev team ever: your codebase has more bugs than a rainforest ecosystem, but instead of fixing them, you're out here chasing the dopamine hit of shipping new features. The girlfriend (bugs) is literally RIGHT THERE, desperately trying to get your attention, but nope—that shiny new feature in the red dress is just too tempting. Classic case of "we'll circle back to those bugs in the next sprint" (narrator: they never did). Eventually the technical debt compounds so hard you need to file for bankruptcy and rewrite the whole thing from scratch. Fun fact: studies show that fixing bugs early costs 5-10x less than fixing them in production, but who needs financial responsibility when you can add a dark mode toggle nobody asked for?

Content Hard to swallow pills JAVASCRIPT ISNTHARD. FRONTEND DEVS JUST COMPLAIN ABOUT IT BECAUSE ITS THE FIRSTTIMETHEY VE HAD TO DO ANYTHING THAT RESEMBLED PROGRAMMING

Content (How do you programso well? (It must be an innate gift.. A gift from God. I'll never understand how some people are so talented. A mystery Practice. It's practice. Practice. Sarah Andersen

Ah, the classic "intern with prod access" scenario – possibly the most terrifying combination since mixing regex and nuclear launch codes. The raccoon manning a golden machine gun perfectly captures that moment when the lowest-ranking team member somehow gets superuser privileges to the production environment. Everyone else has wisely evacuated the premises because they know what happens next: unreviewed code changes, accidental database drops, and configuration "improvements" that bring down the entire infrastructure. That raccoon's about to deploy straight to prod with the same chaotic energy it uses to raid garbage cans. Senior devs are probably hiding under their desks right now, frantically typing up their resumes while the on-call engineer contemplates a new career in organic farming.