When you develop in PHP so HR gave you a helmet to protect you from slamming your head into the table

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JavaScript gets all the love while C, Java, Rust, and others gang up on poor PHP. Then in the shadows, we find the true outcasts: another PHP developer and the mythical Monkey C programmer, sweating nervously because nobody even remembers they exist. The programming language hierarchy in one comic! JavaScript strutting around like it owns the web (it kinda does), while PHP gets bullied despite powering like 80% of the internet. And Monkey C? That's the language you put on your resume when you're hoping the interviewer is too embarrassed to admit they've never heard of it.

Content Pornhub Adult content Montreal QC On-site pornhub.com (NSFW) Come work at the 22nd highest trafficked website in the world. We are looking for: -PHP developers -Senior front-end developers -Senior Product Manager -Senior UIUX designer Must be willing to relocate to Montreal. Email me your CV: PHP DEVI I'm interested but I don't think I'd be comfortable telling my friends and family that's what I do all day That is understandable. I don't think I would be comfortable telling my family that I develop PHP either

In the software development realm, there's a clear hierarchy of suffering, and PHP sits firmly at the bottom. Nobody wants to touch PHP with a ten-foot keyboard until... dramatic lightning someone actually needs it. The comic perfectly captures that moment when developers would rather sit alone in existential despair than volunteer for general programming tasks, but suddenly spring to attention when PHP is mentioned—not out of enthusiasm, but with the maniacal energy of someone who knows they're about to witness a train wreck and can't look away. It's like finding out your friend needs help moving, and you're suddenly very busy—until they mention their new place has a hot tub. Except the hot tub is full of legacy code and deprecated functions.

OMG, the AUDACITY of Python developers complaining about simplicity while PHP is over here literally threatening your code with DEATH! 💀 Like, honey, PHP doesn't ask politely - it's either doThis() or DIE. No negotiation, no therapy session, just pure ultimatum energy. Meanwhile, Python devs are throwing tantrums because their language is TOO USER-FRIENDLY? The DRAMA! The IRONY! I can't even... 🙄